Billy Batson magically transforms into The World's Mightiest Mortal, Captain Marvel by simply saying the name, Shazam. My transformation into Captain Corky is even simpler than that! Most of the time I just type in my E-mail address and password and within a split second I become Captain Corky, The World's Greatest Human Being. Sometimes when I'm drunk it takes me two or three attempts.
It's also important to understand that Marvel has always been one of my favorite comic book characters. He's comparable to Superman in power and I think his cape is really neat.
Before my Batson Period (1996 - present) I was mainly wearing 100 percent cotton, medium size, black tee shirts. I mainly refer to that period of my life as the Curtis Period (1985 - 1996).
But as I started to age and consume more and more beer it was clear that I could no longer pull off the Curtis style that most women were accustomed to seeing me pull off perfectly.
Fortuantly sometime around 96 I discoverd Ringer Tees at Old Navy. At first I mainly purchased black ones cuase I guess a small part of me was still trying to cling on to days and weight gone by.
Eventually I started finding myself more and more drawn to other colors. Colors like gray, navy blue, white, and colors as bold as red! Turns out red is a very good color for me, green not so much.
Currently I must own over 20 of these shirts. Many different colors, styles, and sizes, and I still buy them to this day. Right now at Old Navy you can get a Ringer for 5 bucks. That's not bad. I should also say that they are pretty comfortable and it's easy to blend in at a ball game while wearing one.
As happy as I am with all the ones that I own, I'm still searching for that one perfect Ringer. That one true color and size that screams out Captain Corky's alter ego just like a medium black tee shirt used to during my Curtis Period. One perfect Ringer... just like the one that Billy Batson's been wearing for the past 70 years.
I didn't want to do this. You have forced my hand, sir.