Monday, May 01, 2006


Here are a bunch of pictures of the many loves of the under achiever sitcom character. It's pretty safe to say that Zack was the coolest of all these guys. Zack and Seaver are pretty much tide in the side kick department. Zack had Slater and Screech and Seaver had Eddy and Boner. Slater beats Eddy, but Boner beats Screech. Now it's true, Dobbie had Crebs. Maynard G Crebs beats both boner and Screech but Gillis didn't really have a straight man buddy. So Gillis looses by default. Gillis and Zack could both talk to the TV audience and Seaver couldn't. Zack could call time out on his show and freeze time. I could not tell you which one of these three guys spent the most time in detention. But I know all of them were in trouble all the time. Dobbie had the coolest father, Herbert T Gillis. He spent most his time on the show screaming at Dobie and saying "I gotta kill that boy I just go to". Jason Seaver, Mikes dad was a pain in the ass and was always lecturing Mike. Zack's parents were divorced and we really never saw his father often. Maggie Seaver wins in the best mom department.

I'm sorry Zack but Seaver has you beat in the main squeeze department. Zack dated Stacie Karosi from the Malibu sands episodes and married Kelly Kapowski. Gillis was in love with Thalia Menninger but she was a gold digger and Dobie was to low rent for her. Seaver dated Julie Costello the blonde girl with Seaver in the picture above but the actor who played Seaver got her fired because she posed for Playboy. Lame dude, real lame. Seaver married the other chick on the show and in real life.

Now I will let you decide who you thought was the coolest out of all these guys but I must send a shout out to honorable mentions. Parker Lewis would have been the coolest of all these guys but fox fucked up and canceled the show. He had the best side kicks and the coolest powers. Ferris Bueler had a good movie but a very lame TV show. I know your probably screaming what about Ritchie and the Fonz, they my friends are in a class all by themselves.


Anonymous said...

I usually agree with you
But I can not let this injustice go.
Zach BY FAR had the hottest chicks....Kelly Kapowski is enough but throw is Stacey Karosi and that is a one-two punch that Mike Seaver's Playboy bunny and born- again cannot content with. Thats like saying who is hotter: Christie Tetamante(hot italian) or Donna Del Tufo(born again)?
See what I'm saying?
The Comedian

slater said...

Even I agree with Corky, comedian. If only I had been born 7 years earlier then I could have been Seavers lackey instead, and maybe he would have thrown me a bone.

The Apologist said...

None of you guys get it. Maynard was actually cool. Eddie who added nothing and Slater, steroids and a Gheri Curl, actually competed with Zack. How does that help?

Plus, Bob Denver went on to have life after Dobie. Sure, AC Slater has a talk show, but is that something to brag about?

You think Seaver wins? Check this out.

I am serious about this. F Zack, and F'n F Seaver. Dobie wins hands down.

Ray Comfort said...


you are surley joking if you think either of Zach's chicks measure up to mike seaver's.

um, i never watched dobie gillis and never will. 35 yrs of gilligans island repeats is enough for me.

the possible said...

crazy coincidence:
i finish reading through corky's log and the ensuing debate regarding Zach v Seaver and head out to lunch. i then proceed to walk past Mrs. Seaver on 5th avenue. crazy.
my two cents:
unless Zach becomes a psychotic born again Christian, he is the victor. did you know that Seaver wrote a book about how to convince Atheists to follow Christ. let me clarify. the book does not explain why one should believe in Jesus, it just tells you how to beat a nonbeliever in an argument. according to Greg Pickle from Tennesee, "If you read one Christian book besides the Bible, make it this one." In short, blow me Seaver.

the possible said...

Another thought. While an honorable mention goes out to Parker Lewis (big ups to Kubiac) for his shown being cancelled, one cannot ignore Seaver's role in the demise of Growing Pains. Seaver sunk the ship with his Jesus babble.

captain corky said...

My friend at work went to a retreat last week and Seaver was there. He starts his testimony by saying "your probably asking yourself what is Mike Seaver doing with a bible in his hand."

By the way let's not forget that Zach was on NYPD Blue. But you are right Doug, Maynard was cool, and Maynard was also on a show called Far Out Space Nuts, from those freaks Sid and Marty Krofft.

leonardo Dicaprio said...

Hey Possible, when a sitcom brings a character in like me, to boost declining ratings, well, it's time to bring out the fork. Remember Roy from the Simpsons, who called Homer Mr. S?

Seaver also went on to say that he didn't handle his new passion for the christ correctly and that's why he acted like such an ass.

Kim Jong Ramone said...

OK sorry I showed up late for debate class but wanted to add a few things. Maybe I am putting all my eggs in the John Hughes PG-13 happy ending guy gets cute girl movie ending but I would take Winnie Cooper over all of them those stated.

Other than that how does the fact that AC Slater snaked the Grumbler/Desktop QB's summer camp girlfriend.