Mistaken Identity

If nothing else, you have to give Sugar Ray credit for the title of this album, 14:59. Brilliant. It should also be noted that Mark Mcgrath is the most impressive contestant in the history of VH 1's Rock-'n'- Roll Jeopardy.

I used to think that my 15 minuets came and went the one time I received second place at a Tae Kwon Do tournament, in the 80's. The fight was fixed mind you, but just like the Seattle Seahawks, i'm a good sport.

Anyway, since that time I have essentially been sitting Shiva, mourning my own life for the last umpteenth years. Listening to sad songs, stuffing my face with corn beef and drinking my sorrows away. Then I noticed my name on the list, Blogs of note.

I can finally take the sheets off of the mirrors, blow out the candles and kick out all of the Jews who have been sitting in my living room and eating my food for the last 15 years. I looked in the mirror for the first time today and I said to myself, "your ok, but damn did you pack on a couple of pounds". I'm not the failure I always perceived myself to be. I finally made something of myself, Mom.

I just want to take this opportunity to thank all of you who never gave up on me, my friends, family and of course my beloved wife. Ya' all encouraged me to keep writing despite my posts about pogo sticks and my inability to fathom the comma.

Wait a minuet... That's Captain Picard on that list, not Captain Corky. "Allyson, were going to need 10 pounds of corn beef, pronto".