Monday, May 28, 2007

Attn: Week 34 has Arrived

Honestly, I don't care what you think! I didn't take this picture for the sole purpose of having a picture to post on the log. I love birds, and if you don't believe me read my fucking profile. It even says so there and has for over a year already.

Welcome to week 34 my friends. You may offer your sacrifices at the altar.

As it turns out I didn't go to the shore this weekend, and I forgot to consult with the pregnant woman (aka my wife Allyson) about dragging her to an outside Beatles festival where it's 90 degrees and hot as balls. In other words we didn't go to that either. Nope. I cleaned my toilet instead.

I couldn't imagine my life today without the Brushing Bubbles toilet cleaning system. Could you?
I would definitely be willing to give up the Internet, my cell phone, DVR and drugs in order to keep the single greatest invention of the last 20 years, the Brushing Bubbles toilet cleaning system. Three simple instructions. 1. Clean. 2. Flush. 3. Gone. It's that simple.

For the toilet seat and the rest of my porcelain throne I use Clorox Clean-up. Only after my bathroom smells like the pool at the YMCA am I satisfied with my cleaning job.

It's always a privilege to be the first one to use the toilet after an extremely thorough cleaning. Other comparable satisfying experiences include: 1. A cup off coffee and your first cigarette of the day. 2. Your first beer after 8 hours of working out in the sun. 3. Watching the fourth episode in a Memorial Day Law and Order marathon. 4. Winning the Boston Marathon.

But enough about my toilet already. I also cleaned the kitchen this weekend. Have I ever told you how much I love the Swiffer Sweeper? I may or may not have watched some TV this past weekend, gone to see Pirates 3, or fed the cats. I hope you had a great Memorial Day weekend and got some real cleaning done too. Was it as good for you?

31 comments:

Biddie said...

Happy week 34! I never knew that you were such a fan of birds! Want my blue jay?
I have a Swiffer, but not a Swiffer Swepper, and I haven't been to see Pirates 3 yet. It's on my to do list. My weekend was shit, but it's not a long weekend here, so no big.

The Lone Beader said...

If you win the Boston Marathon, the first thing you'll want to do is find a clean toilet.... Those port-a-potties are nasty. LOL.

Beefcake Almighty said...

We had two baby birds in our backyard for a while until one got too big, fell out, and our dog went after it.

Sad.

Reverend Sumangali Tania Pink said...

Happy 34!

I didn't do any cleaning. But in order to preserve the balance of the universe...I made a good mess.
xx
pinks

captain corky said...

Biddie: I don't think it would be fair to bring your blue jay into my home because my cat Fonzie would rip the poor bird to shreds.
Happy week 34 to you too.

Beader: Don't you mean when I win the Boston Marathon. ;)

That's sad Beefcake.

Pinks: Making a mess is definitely more enjoyable then cleaning one. Happy 34!

whimsicalnbrainpan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
whimsicalnbrainpan said...

My weekend was pretty mellow. Say, I couldn't get you to come over and clean my apartment could I? And I am so with you on satisfying experience #1.

furiousBall said...

doo dah doo doo
doo dah doo da doo
doo dah doo doo
doo da doo da doo da doo

(that's me typing out the keyboard part to Europe's Final Countdown)

Ms. Tuesday said...

Getting close Corky! Could be any day now! Good luck to you (but mostly to Alyson)!

abbagirl74 said...

Laundry, lots and lots of it. I am drowning in a sea of clothes.

captain corky said...

Whim: Nothing like a nice and mellow weekend. I don't clean but I do paint. My friend Lou once hired me and paid me with pizza and corned beef Sandwiches. Corky will work for food!

Furious: Nothing like a little Europe to get ready for the big occasion.

Tuesday: Thank you. I like to take all the credit while Allyson does all the work. ;)

Abbagirl74: We threw out three garbage bags of clothes today and did at least 5 loads of laundry. I feel your pain sister.

Jay said...

Dude I love the Mr. Clean Magic Reach. It's awesome. I put on the scrubbing pad and get everything all scrubbed and then put on the mop pad and finish the job. It's awesome.

Lady K said...

Cleaning sucks.

Pink Floyd rules.

That's all I'm saying.

Have a great week, cork!

karma lennon said...

I love Brushing Bubbles! It is such an awesome invention! :)

Metal Mark said...

I worked in the garden, but did manage to set up our new tent in the backyard. The kids had fun playing in that, but we didn't stay the night in it. We may do that next weekend end if the weather is okay.

Kvatch said...

I also cleaned the kitchen this weekend.

Ah the joys of domesticity. The Frogette has often remarked that if she could keep us in the style to which we've become accustomed, she'd never let me work again.

BTW: I'm honored that you rolled Blognonymous. I've added you to my blogroll as well.

Gina said...

We did, uhhh, a whole lotta nothin'. Oh wait, I went shopping on Saturday with my mom and sister and bought something to make me smell even purtier than usual.

And, with a four year old that has questionable aiming capabilities, Lysol wipes are my best friends.

Jenny! said...

Captian, that was the best post ever...I love cleaning (its says so on my profile)! I get such a boner over cleaning products! Congrats on Week 34!!!

RockDog said...

I did the BBQ thing 3 days in a row! It was sweet and the weather was most excellent!

captain corky said...

Jay: Cleaning really has come along way. It used to be such a chore, and now it's a guilty pleasure.

Lady K: I think that just about says it all K. Have a great week!

Karma: Yes it is. Much more impressive than Satellite TV for sure.

Mark: Sounds like a blast!

Kvatch: Welcome to the family. Membership has it's privileges.

captain corky said...

Gina: I've got to canisters of Lysol wipes ready to go. There's nothing more enjoyable than spending money when there's nothing else to do. Know what I mean?

Jenny: Thanks! I really do enjoy cleaning, but sometimes I like to drink and clean at the same time. Now that's what I call fun!

Rockdog: Sounds great. If I lived closer to you I would have invited myself over for at least two of the meals and a cooler of your beer. ;)

Jenny! said...

That would make it a bit more fun to clean the bathroom I guess! I should try that sometime!

Aunt Jackie said...

Well, you've been by my place already today, so you know. "No, it wasn't as good for me!" :)

Also, I didn't get as much cleaning done as you, but at least I managed some clean laundry for the week.

Next stop: Boston Marathon!

Tink said...

I need you and Hoop to hang out for awhile. Maybe then he'll realize that cleaning the toilet with Windex and a paper towel is NOT good enough.

eric said...

so you drink the beer AFTER the work? but it makes work so interesting.

Michael C said...

Well great, now I need to add two more cleaning tools to my arsenal.

The Lone Beader said...

Okay... 'When' U win... But, just a tip, don't try to take the train through town to get to the finish line. That never works. LOL.

kat said...

HAH! What is up with men loving the Swiffer? Is it some sort of phallic thing that makes you feel powerful or something? Every guy I know is addicted to it.

(We caught a couple fish but nothing big enough to keep)

captain corky said...

Jenny: You should, it's a blast!

Aunt Jackie: Having clean laundry for the week is always a good thing. Always!

Tink: From what I've read about Hoop I think we would be to busy fishing, gambling and drinking to get any cleaning done.

Eric: I clean both ways, but I always do a much more thorough job when I'm drinking

captain corky said...

Michael: You haven't lived until you have cleaned your kitchen floor with the Swiffer Sweeper or eaten french fries with mozzarella cheese and gravy. ;)

Beader: At this point I would be lucky to finish a mile. ;)

Kat: Maybe they put female pheromones into the cleaning solution. The Swiffer does excite me in peculiar ways.

Big Pissy said...

We have a lot of cardinals here at the Casa. They make me happy....so bright red and chipper.

Thank you for the cleaning hints.

I love nothing better than a clean house. Especially when it's been cleaned by someone else. ;-)