Monday, December 22, 2008

Happy Holidays



This Christmas I plan on eating a ton of figgy pudding. I have no idea how to make it or where to get it or what it even tastes like, but there's still three days until Christmas so there's still a chance to make my Christmas wish come true.

On Christmas Eve I plan on discussing the affairs of my friend Bob over a mug of Smoking Bishop. Apparently I won't be able to walk or see straight after a glass of the stuff so I hope Bob takes it easy cause he's my ride home.

Here's the recipe: 5 unpeeled oranges, 1 unpeeled grapefruit, 36 cloves, 1/4 pound of sugar, 2 bottles of red wine, 1 bottle of port.

I also plan on doing a little gambling over the holidays at the World Series of Dreidel.

And finally the thing I'm most excited for this Christmas is the Lexus that Allyson is going to surprise me with on Christmas morning. I can't wait for that! I've never gotten a 65,000 dollar Christmas present before... It's bringing a tear to me eye just thinking about it.
Happy Holidays my friends. Now go fix yourself a generous mug of some smoking bishop and kick back and relax.

39 comments:

Jay said...

I don't know about the Figgy Pudding, but the Smoking Bishop sounds like a great idea!

And enjoy the Lexus. You're gonna look really hot driving around in that. ;-)

Merry Christmas!

Bonnie Blue said...

Hope you guys have a wonderful holiday! Sounds like you have some good stuff planned. I know I've been a bit MIA but I've been sick...LONG STORY. Anyway...I have been reading, just not commenting so much and I owe you congrats on baby #2. So, Congrats!

furiousBall said...

wait... isn't smoking bishop a euphemism for a hummer?

Dana said...

I plan on getting drunk - VERY drunk!

eric1313 said...

Sounds pretty good to me! But I'm already half drunk on vodka, so I don't know how all that fruit and wine will go... but that's life! It's all about adventure.

Anonymous said...

They have gone and "improved" the Yule Log after 40 years. Is nothing sacred?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dPHtKarae2Q

Anonymous said...

I bet that Smokin' Bishop will put a dent in your chin!
You'll look like a young John Travolta.

jAMiE said...

Have a very Merry Christmas Corky...drive safely in your new car...and enjoy the holidays with your loved ones!

Molly said...

I have actually had figgy pudding because my mother liked to investigate usual foods. The pudding is more like cake with figs. You would enjoy the topping called hard sauce, which contains some kind of booze. Although I have never had smoking bishop, my mother would have loved making and drinking such a concoction.

Enjoy driving the brand new Lexus. Merry Christmas.

dilling said...

man, i love the log show! that's the best holiday tradition ever!

The Lone Beader® said...

Hahaha! Don't drink too much!

Burfica said...

your dam fire is broke, I'm still cold. sheesh!!!!!

Burfica said...

Merry Christmas anyway my friend!!!!

captain corky said...

Jay: I think I might really make some smoking bishop. It sounds really good and it would really knock me on my ass. LOL

Bonnie Blue: Thanks! It's good to know that you're still around out here in blog land. :)

Furious: You mean the All-terrain vehicle?

Dana: That plan always works for me!

Eric: I have a feeling I'll be half drunk from just smelling the stuff.

captain corky said...

Leslie: How dare they!

Anonymous: That's all I really want for Christmas!!!

Jamie: Thanks! Really I'm just making fun of how superficial those Lexus commercials are. I don't know if you've seen them but they are nauseating!

Molly: The more I think about it the more I want to try my hand and my gullet at some smoking bishop.

Dilling: I plan on watching it for a little while too. It's on one of the syndicated cable channels our of Chicago.

captain corky said...

Beader: Wouldn't dream of it. ;)

Burfica: I can't feel the heat but just wait until I pour a glass of Smoking Bishop down my throat. I'll be really cozy then! Merry Christmas to you too.

Michael Colvin said...

Now I don't think I could bring myself to put anything with the name bishop in it anywhere near my purty heathen lips.

Merry Christmas to you guys!

Aunt Jackie said...

I'm with Jay on the smoking bishop rofl. :) I'll definitely enjoy a few treats for Christmas though.

Hope you guys do the same. Take care of all the Corky gang!

Biddie said...

Merry Christmas, Corky. I am so happy for you and Allyson. Give Max a big hug from me.
Has he learned to say my name yet? Bridget is too hard, so Biddie is fine :)

Chris H said...

Merry Christmas mate, hope you get all you wished for. I wished for a Toyota Landcruiser.. but am getting a Highlander instead, but that's OK, anything is better than a Lexus!!! ho ho ho

Gina said...

OMG! That little guy over there is just the cutest!

Merry Christmas to Captain Corky and family!

captain corky said...

Tod: Thanks! I really wish I had read the directions a couple of days ago cause it actually sounds really good! Merry Christmas to you and yours.


Aunt Jackie: Merry Christmas! Enjoy all the yummy treats.

Biddie: I think he has a good shot of saying Biddie, but right now we're working on football and playoffs. ;)

Chris H: At the risk of sounding extremely cheesy I really do have all I could ever have wished for. Merry Christmas!

Gina: Thanks! Merry Christmas to you and your family!

Cate Subrosa said...

Happy Christmas, Corky! Have a good one ;)

eric1313 said...

Merry Christmas!

And let me tell ya this: Got to you tube and search for "Holy Shit it's Christmas"

You will not be disappointed.

Real Live Lesbian said...

Pass that Smoking Bishop!

Thanks for the virtual fire...it's positively lovely and it didn't get my floor all nasty!

Merry Christmas to you and the family!

Rick Rockhill said...

now bring US the figgy pudding too.

Have a Merry Little Christmas Corky!

-Rick

Michael Knight Rambo said...

Merry X-Mas!!!

Pink said...

nah...just having some marguerritas...a LOT of them.

xx
pinks

Big Pissy said...

My oldest daughter just got a Lexus.

Used.

It did NOT cost $65,000.

Promise!

Hope you're Christmas was merry! :)

Ed & Jeanne said...

You are about to be removed from my blog roll!!! It’s nothing personal…I’m restarting for 2009 this Thursday. Were you at the top of the list in 2008? If not, here’s your chance to be. A single comment gets you on my blog roll. Keep commenting and you’ll stay at the top. Hope to see you in 2009!

Michael Knight Rambo said...

Hey, Happy New Year!!!

jAMiE said...

Hey You...hope you have a very Happy, Healthy New Year!!!

Alekx said...

How'd that Lexus turn out for you?

I got pots and pans, granted they are nice pots and pans. VERY NICE

I wanted a Wii

Guess what the hubby is getting for Valentines. Go ahead...Guess. :-)

Happy New Year

Kelly said...

HAPPY NEW YEAR! How did the holidays treat you and yours?

Ed & Jeanne said...

Of course...that's calorie free, right?

DJ Kirkby said...

Hi CC
I've given you an award, happy new year.

Anonymous said...

Hope your holidays were the best, Corky. Happy New Year!

neroli said...

Happy New Year, Captain darling---I've been gone so long, and your kiddo is so big and fabulous, and your family is blessed with an arrival coming in May?!?

How wonderful is that?!?

Drizel said...

Hey Al Capitan.

Hope you had a great time over Xmas and hope the bishop did not make you drive skew;)

Happy new year to you and your family may it be a kick A$$ year:)