Welcome Back Corky

Friends,

Please excuse Corky for being absent over the past few weeks. Last week he was in Florida observing wild life, swimming, visiting family, and dodging random bolts of lightning. He had very little access to the Internet and the strain of not being able to access his blog or check email or go to various other websites that he frequents everyday like Facebook and Youporn almost killed him, but through the grace of George Carlin he made it home in one piece and has since been rejuvenated.

Now that the Captain is back home in Kentucky, I can assure you that he will be more regular. There's even talk of a 4th of July Comment-a-thon. Some newer readers to log might now understand what that means, but soon they will completely understand. Corky has foreseen this.

Thank you for your concern, patience, and understanding.

Sincerely,

Epstein's Mom

Goodbye Summer

I can't believe that Summer's almost over. Time really flew by this year. I wonder if the little shit who through the clock out of the window is responsible for how fast the Summer of 08 has passed...

I hope everyone had a good one. I know we did. Still, I really would have liked to have had a chance to do more fishing and maybe some camping. There's always next year though.


Summer came and went, but now it's time to get ready for Fall. Soon the Cooler air will be here and we'll all be wearing sweaters and eating lots of soup.

How did you spend the Summer of 08?

1st Official Father's Day

What I really want for Father's Day is a tractor. It would be great if I had one cause there's a mound of dirt in my front yard right now.

Anyway, Father's Day is going to be extremely busy for my wife, Allyson. I still haven't finalized or posted the itinerary yet and it's only three days away.

I'm not sure if I want her to wake me to a nice hot bowl of Quaker Oats, or a toasted peanut butter sandwich... Both are delectable day in and day out.

I also want to make sure that she understands that I come first on Sunday and not Max. I love the kid with all my heart, but She and He gotta understand that Daddy only gets his day in the Sun once or twice a year at best.

We also haven't decided what Max is going to be giving me. So many choices: Grill, tool bench, tractor, drill, garbage cans, drill, tool bench, grill that uses propane gas, a lawn mower with a bigger engine and more torque, or paint.

It's a complete mess I tell you. Give me a day or two and I'll figure it all out.

In the meantime I think Max is getting the hang of Summer.

Waste

I have big news that I've been dying to share with you since before we went away last weekend. As of 5/28/2008 our home has finally kicked the septic habit and is now connected to the city sewer system. I told you it was big news!

Louisville is a very progressive city and it doesn't surprise me one bit that we are one of the first cities in the world to go from septic to sewer.

Every time I flush the toilet I imagine taking the great journey the water takes from bowl to basement and finally out to sewer.

Hell, I don't even mind that we were mandated by the city to pay a contractor 2800 dollars to connect to the sewer. Truth is I've always been ashamed that we lived in a house with a septic system... Thankfully I don't have to live with that burden ever again.

I don't know if you've had a plumber out to your house in the last year or so, but plastic is all the rage as far as pipes go. All the big time plumbers talk about plastic pipes. Plastic pipes are big, clean, and white.

Absolutely No one in this house hold is going to do anything to fuck them up, so from this day forward my family only eats Quaker Oats! Lots of fiber in Quaker Oats. Plus, Q. Oats are cheap as dirt and only take one minute to cook, but most importantly they are delicious! Especially plain.