Wednesday, September 01, 2010

Twelve Angry Freshmans

I joined school. My job pays for it so why not take advantage of the benefit. I look forward to watching the tax woman at H&R Block apply the Hope Credit to my 2010 Tax Return. Just thinking about it really excites me and I have to be careful not to wear sweatpants when I'm out in public, especially when I'm walking past an H&R Block Tax Den.

School and I have not always gotten along and I wasn't a very successful freshmans the last time I joined school, but this time feels right. Not only does it feel right, but I'm conferencing and following suggestions from folks that have had success at being a freshmans in the past, like my wife for example. Don't tell anyone, but I'm really enjoying school.

I'm taking one class this semester to ease myself into being a freshmans. It's called Intro to Writing. It blows my fucking mind how much I've learned since class started on August two Mondays ago. Did you know that there are more writers than just Peter, Ilia, and myself out there in the world? I didn't know that. Amazing shit.

I call the English class Twelve Angry Freshmans even though none of us really seem that angry about anything. One kid grew up in Germany and when I draw him in my mind he looks exactly like Fred Flintstone. Two of the kids are a little older than Flintstone and both served over in Iraq and Afghanistan. One is in school to be an officer in the military and the other veteran wants to be a used car sales man. There are also a few girls in the class: A chick who buries her emotions in sports, a chick who just graduated from catholic school, a chick who writes Twilight fan fiction, and a chick who looks sort of like Rory Gilmore. I make eight of the Twelve Angry Freshmans and the other four freshmans in the class can be found under various trees at 8:16 PM playing various guitars.

Twelve Angry Freshmans meets two days a week. The classes are on Mondays and Wednesdays from 7:00 PM to 8:15 PM. The class time works really well with my schedule and I'll make sure to book home on Mondays after class so I don't miss a second of Jon Gruden's Monday Night Football analysis. Thank God I only live about seven miles from the University.

This is a conversation I'll probably have with one of the freshmans on September 27th: "Sorry freshmans hippie playing guitar under the tree, BUT I GOT TO GET HOME TO WATCH THE PACKERS SLAUGTER THE BEARS." As I'm running away from the hippie to get to my car he'll probably think to himself or maybe even sing a song about me having some kind of hard-on for the Packers so I'll make sure to wear my Colts hat on Wednesday September 29th to eliminate any confusion the hippie might have as to which team Captain Corky routes for.

During the next few semesters I'll be taking gen ed classes and I'm pretty sure I know what degree I want to pursue. Ultimately though, I hope that my experience at school strengthens me as an American and as a citizen of the World. The best part about joining school is that I can start watching football on Saturdays now. Do they have college fantasy football?


Jay said...

Be sure to give Rory Gilmore my phone number.

Anonymous said...

Awesome. I'm so glad to hear you are enjoying your class. Hilarious commentary. But, I am curious, what does taking a class on Mondays and Wednesday have to do with being able to watch football on Saturdays?

joe r said...

Sounds like a good week to me. Go Pack. If you have interest in doing some part time work up there this tax season check us out.

Lieutenant Ilia said...

Normally I'd make some snide comment about the Packers, but I must concede. This preseason, the Bears have looked like a junior high school football team.