Friday, June 09, 2006

One more for the road

My fellow Corkians, as my wife and I get ready to embark on our journey accross America's amber waves of grain, to spend time with our family and friends, a certain amount of exhilaration fills our hearts. We look foward to the immediate future, knowing that all will be as it should be, at least that was what i thought...

Well, it is my unfourtunate duty to report to you that i have discovered a plot against me, my wife and all of America for that matter. It seems a small terrorist organazation operating out of Morris Planes and Brooklyn has planed to kidnap me and my wife from Livingston and are going to take us to Brooklyn, and then they are gowing to hold us at "Giant of Pitbowl" point, growl, bark range, so they can force us to do the unthinkable, watch World Cup Soccer!

I have no doubt that my secret service opperatives out of Manhantten and Connecticut will come to our rescue. After all, I know that they are true red blooded Americans and they like me know that fut-ball in America is pronounced football.


The Apologist said...

Vincent: Nah, man, they got the metric system, they don't have "American Football."

Jules: What do they call it?
Vincent: They call it "Gridiron."

Jules: "Gridiron?"
Vincent: Thats right.

Jules: So what DO they play, soccer?

Vincent: Well, yeah, soccer is still soccer, but they call it "football."

metric man said...

but for the actor, this fine country would now be on the metric system. alas, the great communicator said measuring distances, weights, and important sums in units of 10 was un-american. now we are happily measuring in units of 12 and 16.