Monday, January 15, 2007
Coinciding with the arrival of our baby due on July 10th, I'm very happy to announce that Corky & Co. will be introducing a new line of Captain Corky action figures. I will introduce the line up after you enjoy a few testimonials from actual friends of Captain Corky, and one from Corky himself.
"Kids don't have the kind of quality toys to play with like we had back in the 70's, and early 80's, and I just can't let my kid start off life in this world with that kind of disadvantage". - Captain Corky 1/15/2007.
"I come across many people who don't have a personality or a mind of their own... and clearly it's because they didn't hang out with Corky when he was younger, and play with his Mego action figures. Fortunately I did"! -The Birdman
"Were it not for being exposed to Captain Corky's extensive super hero collection when I was younger, chances are I would have joined a fraternity in college, and spent the rest of my life working as a used car sales man, and living in my parents attic". -Kim Jong Ramone
"I was a very angry kid when I was younger, that is until Corky introduced me to Playmobil. After that I never went anywhere without a smile on my face". -Willsix
"Were it not for GI Joes, Corky never would have taken any interest in me and instead of graduating from one of the best Colleges in the county, I'd still be hanging around with the local neigborhood miscreant, Al". -The Apologist
"Corky has serious fucking issues"! -The Grumbler
The Action figures:
Gym Rat Corky: Figure comes with chafed skin, huge pecks, big biceps, and a removable 25 pound gut.
Ice cream scooping Corky: Figure comes with a purple Friendly's polyester suit, lots of zits, makes minimum wage, and runs into the girl that he has had a crush on since freshmen year of high school three times a week, while wearing the purple polyester suit.
Compulsive Corky: Figure comes with an empty 2 litter to be used as a spittoon. Figure also has no less than two cans of copenhagen on him at all times. Figure likes to drink, gamble and smoke from time to time too.
Genius Corky: This figure is fairly obvious.
More to come!