Thursday, May 31, 2007

Self Worth

My addiction to comments has spilled over into my real life. When I first started blogging I was lucky to get two or three comments in a week and those came from people that I know on the outside. Back in those days 3 comments in one week meant that I wrote some really serious shit. Now I can't function if I don't get at least 30 comments per post. Sometimes I worry that it might be something I wrote, but very quickly that thought dissipates and I blame you for letting your real life interfere with my self worth. That's right, my entire self image is completely contingent on you.

But you're not always available... Sometimes lightning strikes your computer. Sometimes you choose to spend time with your family who's come in from out of town. And even worse than those two examples, sometimes motherfuckers disappear like a fart in the wind overnight(Shawshank Redemption). That's why I now carry a comment box (that looks like a suggestion box) around with me in real life. I need my fucking fix!!! I constantly need comments. Here's how it works: I supply everyone I come in contact with with a pen and stack of index cards, and at first I carried my comment box with me everywhere that I went, but soon afterwords I started wearing it around my neck (this was my wife's suggestion). I encourage the people that I work with to comment on everything about me, from what I'm wearing to how many calories I'm stuffing in my face. If I make a joke and they laugh I encourage them to leave a comment. If they feel uncomfortable signing their names I tell them to leave an anonymous comment when I go to take a piss or get a cup of coffee.

But it gets even worse than that. I can't communicate with Allyson anymore without the comment box. For example, now when we're done having sex and laying in bed afterwords I don't say anything to her. I just pick up the comment box and shake it at her. Yeah. It's gotten that bad. I also recently just put a bumper sticker on my car that says, How's my driving? Please leave a comment at Corkyslog.blogspot.com. I'm also thinking about advertising my blog on billboards all across the Pennsylvania Turnpike. That way I can drum up a whole lot of trucker comments.

Obviously Corky Jr is going to wear a comment box around his neck too, but I'll probably wait until he can hold is head up by himself. Anyway, some of my favorite bloggers are coming back next week. You know what that means don't you? More love for Corky!!!

You complete me. ;)

178 comments:

Tink said...

You ROCK!

Shove that in your box.

Which sounds a whole lot dirtier than I meant it to.

etain_lavena said...

RIGHT Capitan I see you forgot to take your tablets for the last year and your brain is now turning into a weird weird mushy comment pile....but we are here for you and you complete us too...mwah mwah:)

Ms. Tuesday said...

LOL I think thats a brilliant idea!

But Corky, how do you have time to read all the blogs of the people who comment you?? I can hardly keep up with the 6 I check every day!!

When the baby comes will you become one of those "farts in the wind"?

=) Funny post

captain corky said...

Tink: Thanks! I love when you talk dirty to me even though this is the first time.

Etain: That's a pretty good description of my brain and I'm glad things are coming together for you in England.

Tuesday: I don't really watch as much television as I pretend to and Allyson sleeps a lot due to being pregnant. And I hope never to quit the log.

TheBirdman33 said...

You have so many issues, I don't know where to begin.

TheBirdman33 said...

You should start putting cards that have your web address in to random magazines at random stores, like the ads that are in there for their own mags...

I bet you would see a nice spike in readership.

Michael C said...

AWESOME IDEA!!!!
What's it like to get 30 comments? Some of us still have to dream ;-)

Jay said...

I know exactly how you feel. Back when I only got a dozen or so comments I was having real self-confidence issues. Now that up over 30 a day I realize just how fucking awesome I really am.

Oh .. this was about YOU? Oh .. My bad.

I love the bumper sticker idea dude! That's brilliant. And for some reason I'm betting Allyson doesn't enjoy having that comment box shook in front of her every night. hahaha

The Lone Beader said...

I'm addicted to comments, too. LOL! What bothers me is that I know now many people read my blog everyday, but never leave a comment... I guess it's just not for everyone... :(

Lady K said...

Can't. Stop. Laughing.

Turnpike SUCKS. I HATED that shit when I lived back up that way.

Hope Cork Jr. is doing well, and that Allyson's comments are, uh...positive. Don't put that comment box around his neck until he can hold his head up by himself! LOL

You fucking complete ME, Cork. Ya crack me up when I really need it.

Lady K said...

p.s. I totally agree with Birdman about putting the random cards in magazines and shit. You'd have more stalkers in no time.

Lady K said...

One more comment, to boost your "comment tab:"

TAG!!!

Sunshine said...

Glad to know you don't mind outing yourself as a comment whore. My biggest thrill was back when I finally passed the 10 threshold. Then 20. Now 30 or more gets my motor running.
And I can only assume you were referencing my "lightning" issues...and we all know who we can blame for that. God.
You know what's gonna happen now, don't you? I'm going to get struck by lightning myself for suggesting that, then I'll really have trouble commenting on your blog. But at least great great grandpa and I will have something in common. Though I am NOT sitting on a tractor.

Anonymous said...

Dude.

Your driving sucks. Next time you cut me off in traffic I'm gonna shoot you, you *(*$£"*@~!

xx
Slim

Pink said...

Corky,

You could always hang the comment box on the pram. Babies are an amazing comment magnet.

I have one pasted over my computer at work.

Not a picture. A baby.

xx
pinks

captain corky said...

Birdman: That's not a bad idea. Perhaps I can start advertising at Best Friends?

Michael: If you would just stop spending so much time with Lucy and Ethel and start devoting more time to your blog you would have over 30 comments in no time.

Jay: LOL Jay. Your comment was hillarious! Almost as funny as one of mine, but not quite.

Beader: Nothing angers me more than a deadbeat reader(A person who reads, but does not comment).

captain corky said...

Birdman: That's not a bad idea. Perhaps I can start advertising at Best Friends?

Michael: If you would just stop spending so much time with Lucy and Ethel and start devoting more time to your blog you would have over 30 comments in no time.

Jay: LOL Jay. Your comment was hillarious! Almost as funny as one of mine, but not quite.

Beader: Nothing angers me more than a deadbeat reader(A person who reads, but does not comment).

Feels Like Home said...

I am guilty of being a deadbeat reader. I have been a fan of the log for some time now and never commented because its hard to break into this sort of thing. I almost feel as though I am invading your privacy. Though, I suppose that you don't mind too much since its on the internet and all. So, my comment for the day will be to introduce myself. I come to you through Ms. Tuesday and I LOVE your work. Good luck with the last few weeks of the pregnancy.

karma lennon said...

Wow. That's really funny and somewhat disturbing at the same time. ;)

Laurasia said...

I totally agree. You're always the person who helps to validate me and my posts...lol!

I'm sure that's not a good thing, but I appreciate you for being a good sport all the more.

You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours, yeah?

Lady K said...

Just stopped by again to add to your comment numbers. Am I the best or what??? LOL Have a great weekend, Cork.

Terri said...

I'm here too!

Great post.

You've been a great supporter of mine so you can count on my comments too.

Have a great weekend.

furiousBall said...

30? you bastid.

I do understand that undying need to be loved. Fridays are low comment days for me usually. I think we should start a support group.

Metal Mark said...

I have nothing much to say, but I don't want you to feel bad so add this to your total for the day.

Jenny! said...

Does you wife like to touch your comment box??? You make me laugh! That was great and I have been know to double comment b/c of lack of patience so if you'd like, I can do that often! I wonder if they have meeting for this kind of addiction and if they hand out valium....I could def. use some of that!

Alicia said...

You had me at hello.

Bardouble29 said...

You crack me up!!!

RockDog said...

I see youa re at 27 comments, so it is safe to comment. I don't ever want to be the 30th comment that makes your day and gives you wood.

Gina said...

I hear you. I used to be very wrapped up in my comments until through meditation and deep breathing, I managed to reach a place of true enlightenment.

NOT.

Anyhoo, I have sort of stopped going to new blogs (except for yours, you should feel so privileged) so I know that without the tit-for-tat so to speak, my comments will most likely stay fairly static.

captain corky said...

Golly! I can't get this shit grinning smile off my face. I'm not sure if it's all the love or the vodka I'm sipping on(It's cocktail hour folks, I just got off from working).

I guess it's only natural that I leave the 30th comment. You guys are great sports and a lot of fun!

By the way what I really meant to say was 50, 50 comments. Yeah. ;)

captain corky said...

Feels Like Home: By revealing yourself you just made a pact with the devil. The devil being me of course. Welcome, I appreciate your kind words.

Karma: You know I'm disturbing and you wouldn't want your Corky any other way!

Laurasia: (whispers) If you post it, Corky will comment.

Lady K: Are you trying to get in my pants? ;)

Terri: Thanks! I enjoy your blog and some day I'm going to ask you to send me cupcakes.

captain corky said...

Furiousball: Next weekend is the million comment march. More details later.

Mark: Thanks. A lot of times I have never heard of the bands you talk about on your blog, but I still appreciate what you do. It's quality stuff.

Jenny: I'm a pretty compulsive guy. If the paraphernalia that comes a long with this addiction is Dictionary.com then I'll take it every time. ;)

Alicia: If it weren't for the fact that you're a Broncos fan you would be perfect. ;)

Bardouble: I'm glad I can make you smile.

captain corky said...

Rockdog: LOL! Rock on!

Gina: I look forward to seeing your pigtails daily and I really enjoy reading your posts!

Ms. Tuesday said...

Sometimes I call you Corky when referring to you in the real world. Does this constitute a problem? Combine this with your tranition to real world commenting.... maybe you're becoming a machine!!

captain corky said...

I became part of the machine a long time ago when I got that blasted job. Almost 7 years ago to this day.

Anonymous said...

Hi hunky,

I am the redhead in the ferrari that you passed on the I10 yesterday.

I saw your bumper sticker.

Who is this Corky Junior fellow?

Pink said...

Hi Corkster,

I bought this really cool star trek puzzle, but then I got to the captain and I seem to have a few pieces missing.

I guess I can't complete it.

;-)

Scotty said...

Hey!

I'M the one thats supposed to be in the news!

Ya gotta splatter over new mexico to get any attention around here and all you got is a comments box?

Why didn't I think of that, Captain?

Aye.
xx
Scotty

Pink said...

Are we at 50 yet? ;-)

Spok said...

Humans are fascinating

Jenny! said...

He he he, Rock Dog is dirty but very funny!

captain corky said...

You love me pinks. You really love me!!!

Biddie said...

Holy crap. Talk about feeding your ego.
Sigh.

captain corky said...

Jenny: You should read the Rockdog. His shit's good!

Biddie: What took you so long? ;)

Sunshine said...

I risk the wrath of God and he says nothing????
Schmuck.

Kvatch said...

It is so time for an intervention:

Hi...my name's Corky, and I'm addicted to blog comments.

Hi Corky!

captain corky said...

Sunshine: I did respond to that comment, but apparently I deleted it. For real! I saved the same batch or responses twice.

Actually it really turned me on that you defied the all mighty. TMI? . But I think you should apologize because I need to read your posts and receive daily comments from you.

Sarah said...

Im so glad I came to yourblog today. I would hate to think that I contributed to your loss of self worth!

captain corky said...

Kvatch: I'm just not ready to admit that I have a problem.

captain corky said...

Sarah: Welcome! It's an even more dangerous world in here then it is out there.

captain corky said...

Well, we shouldn't let the comments stagnate on 50, should we.

kat said...

I have several comments and will be posting them each individually.

Comment #1: I wish I could read blogs every day. I don't have this kind of time. When I do have time I read ritualistically. I pour a glass of wine and settle in front of the monitor and read my favorites in order. I'll have you know - you are one of the first I read whenever I get the chance! And I comment whenever I feel I have something to offer to the conversation. Hope this pleases you, sir.

kat said...

Comment #2: When people leave you anonymous comments while you are in the bathroom, do you close your eyes while they put the comment in the box or do they just stand behind you while you are at the urinal so you can't see who they are while you are doing your business?

Jenny! said...

La la la la, la la la la la...does this work???

kat said...

Comment #3: Do you think there are any truckers out in this world that read blogs? Seriously I really am curious about this now.

kat said...

Comment #4: I appreciate quotes from Shawshank. Tied for best movie ever in my opinion.

captain corky said...

Kat: This pleases me very much. I am having a couple of cocktails myself today. I work at night so I get a lot more alone time to read blogs and whatnot and my schedule is considerably less hectic than yours is.

captain corky said...

Kat: I thought about that after I wrote the post and wanted to kick my self in the ass for that mistake in continuity, but then I thought about what William Shatner would say, "It was just a show people". ;) It's assumed that I take the box off when I got to piss.

captain corky said...

Jenny: Feed me!!!

captain corky said...

Kat: I don't know, but I've met a lot of fucks out here who worship their fathers because Daddy's a truck driver. Seriously. I guess it's because they never see daddy or something.

captain corky said...

Kat: What is Shawshank tied with? Grease 2? Do you like Adrian Zmed as much as me and the birdman do?

Jenny! said...

Placenta, sound good???

Jenny! said...

Or would you prefer chili sauce?

Jenny! said...

Or even better yet, homemade semen ranch!

kat said...

It is tied with Memoirs of a Geisha. Which is an amazing film. I am saving my money to go to Japan to meet Geishas - I'm pretty obsessed.

I am a Zmed fan but not for Grease 2. I was a Dance Fever fanatic. Had a major crush on him as a little kid.

captain corky said...

Jenny: That pretty much summarizes your last 3 posts and feeds my insatiable hunger for comments at the same time. Good job!!!

Kat: I knew that damn it. Did you like Zmed in T.J. Hooker?

What kind of wine are you drinking?

Big Pissy said...

Jesus!

I'm at the salon for 3 hours and all hell breaks loose!

You crack me up AND complete me, Cork!

I'm comment #67....I'll check back later and leave 3 more comments if no one else gets to it first. ;-)

Heidi the Hick said...

67 comments!!! You are my hero.

I need validation too. I'm having crises because I've only been getting comments in the under 20 range and some of them are me replying, and this gives me huge selfconfidence problems...

I gotta get me a comment box. I promise I'll attribute it to you.

Now about that billboard idea... I think I need to get some stickers made up and distribute them around all the feed mills, tack shops, livestock auctions and movie theatres in a one-hour's drive radius eh?

captain corky said...

Pissy: Glad you could make it to the party and I'm sure you look wonderful as always. ;)

Heidi: I live within 5 miles of Churchill Downs. You know what that means don't you? Tons of people with fast and beautiful horses that need a blog leader. I'll hook you up!

captain corky said...

I'm not waiting till fucking Christmas for number 70. You didn't think I would, did you?

Tighten up people!

Cheryl said...

God Damn, 70 comments? Where'd you say you got that box from?

captain corky said...

Actually Cheryl dear, you're 71 and I'm 72 and Pissy promised me 3 more, so that's 75. 72 + 3 = 75 right?

Anonymous said...

Ahem. Has he gone to pee?

(looks around to confirm)

Good.


(scribbling)

"your coffee sucks. Let someone else make a pot now and then, will ya?
xx
Your coworkers"

Shit. Here he comes.

(scrunchle scruffle, shove shove, box lid slams)

(whistles, looks around guiltily and shuffles along)

Uhuru said...

Captain, I have opened a hailing frequency. There is a message coming in from planet keetchen.

Your wife is calling you for dinner.

Strange message, Captain. Should I try to retranslate into the integalactic federation esperanto?

Pink said...

Hi Corky,

How's it going? What? I'm number 74? WOW!!!!

you ARE popular!
xx
pinks

Pink said...

oh no wait...I meant 75...which makes this one 76...geez...and they call me an accountant?

how's the advertising working? Have you gotten any payback from it yet?

xx
pinks

Pensynlvania Surfer Dude said...

Woah. You read Whatnot too?

I thought I was the only one into that mag...yaaaw. Gnarly.
xx

Dumb Blonde said...

So...like...if you work at night...how do you see what you're doing? Does your comment box like glow in the dark or something?

like xx

captain corky said...

Pinks: It's not like I'm sitting in front of my computer while Allyson reads, as I listen to Maria Carey with Boys to Men... No I'm not doing that at all! Actually I'm listening to Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrel sing "Aint No Mountain High Enough while Allyson reads. At least I think it's Tammi Terrel...

Pink said...

wait...whats this?

"some of my favorite bloggers are coming back next week" (?!?!!)

But...I don't think I've been anywhere...oh ya...Switzerland!

Whew.

For a minute there I thought we weren't your favorite bloggers.

(you complete us too!)

I think thats 79 now.

;)

Pink said...

Aw darn...I miscounted again...so that was 80...now I guess this one is 81.

:)

ok. me retiring for the night here in London

xx

HoosierGirl5 said...

I'm #82?! Wow, you ARE awesome.

And you were right with the comment you left on my last post - your relaxing days are over, bud!
I don't get to relax for another 11 years (when Aaron turns 18!)!!!

Get some sleep tonight. You're gonna need it!

J.

Sunshine said...

Grease 2 forever....oh, yeah, and Xanadu. Gotta love a movie with the main character on roller skates.

Biddie said...

Oh come on....

Biddie said...

You're killing me here...

Big Pissy said...

I promised you three more....but you don't need them.

Big Pissy said...

Wait a minute!!!!!

Some of your favorite bloggers have been gone this week?!?!?

Was I out of town?!?!

Big Pissy said...

I think NOT!!!!

Big Pissy said...

That hurts, Cork....really hurts...

::sniffle:::

Big Pissy said...

But just to show you that I love you anyway....here's your 90th comment. ;-)

Sunshine said...

Yes, Pissy, you were too wrapped up in your pink Keds to notice Corky and his ailing ego.

Pink said...

wow...good morning Cork.

You've been collecting the comments haven't you?
xx
pinks

Pink said...

ok i'm off to a country wedding. Have fun today
xx
pinks

Blogspot Comment Verification Committee said...

You are currently under investigation for illegal storehousing of comments.

It would appear that some of these have been manufactured under false conditions, and using the labour of 3rd world children.

We will confer with you on our findings soon.

xx
BCVC

Sigmund Freud said...

This need for comment as a means of self worth is a classic manifestation of early issues in weaning.

I would intensive recommend corrective therapy now.

Its probably unlikely to cure you. But at least it will be fun.

xx
Sigmund

Sigmund Freud said...

that is...I would recommend intensive corrective therapy

Mein Got! Vat do you expect from a dead man here!

Zis is vat ve call ze Freudian Slip

xx
Siggy

Pink said...

Oh hey...why don't you tell us about YOURS and ALLYSON's wedding.

I'm sure Cork J would love to hear it too!

xx
pinks

Bones said...

What kind of a doctor do you call yourself, Siggy?

I may be a simple country doctor but you sound like a quack. This nonsense will never catch on!

xx
Bones

Sigmund Freud said...

Blast off will you, Bones. No...thats not phallic...sitting on a rocket...no....

I have an appointment next Friday at 2pm if you are interested

Pink said...

Comment 100!

Woo Hoo!

(I need a cigarette now)

:)

My job is done here.
xx
pinks

Pink said...

What are you doing over there in America? Sleeping? Wake up! Its a beautiful and sunny day here in the South of England.

I@m in the back of a car with Uni friends, heading up north of oxford for the wedding. I have wireless access apparently :-)

come on...don't be a sleepy head...we've broken 100!

Pink said...

well...this blogging while on the road idea gives credence to the notion that truck drivers read your blog

:-)

xx
pinks

HoosierGirl5 said...

Wow. Last night I was #82. Now I'm #103. Do you feel the love yet?

J.

Beefcake Almighty said...

You need to get help. Professional help. QUICK.

Sunshine said...

And the hits keep coming...

captain corky said...

It's a beautiful thing.

Pink said...

Hi Corks,

The wedding was absolutely gorgeous. A real upper class english country wedding on a country estate.

I could hardly believe it sometimes, when I look around and realise I'm here, in the middle of this life.

I hope you feel a little of that today, my dear blog pal.

If you don't - take a good look at Allyson's tummy and feel Jr kick!

Life is amazing...you are one lucky bastard.

Cuz..on top of it...you now have 107 comments!
xx
pinks

abbagirl74 said...

Well, I hope I am the last of your comments. Holy Cow Batman!

Cheryl said...

Not the last abbagirl. I have a feeling this one's gonna go on for a while. As in a life of it's own. Go Corky! More love for you.

TheBirdman33 said...

The fact that this comment is the 110th is abso-fucking-lutely absurd.

Pink said...

Well 111 is even weirder birdman.

(do i detect a note of envy?)

you could get yourself a comment box, but it should have wings to reflect your unique personality.

I think mine would have to be made of pink candyfloss.

:-)

111 and counting!
xx
pinks

Anonymous said...

are you feeling the love yet bruv?

etain_lavena said...

ghee Capitan you have lots and lots now:)

whimsicalnbrainpan said...

LMFAO! I love this post.

Jay said...

I'm so jealous I can barely stand it now. Over 100 comments? You're my new hero.

Pink said...

Corky,

You've always been my hero.

xx
pinks

Scotty said...

Aye. Mine too Captain.

Bones said...

You know, Jim, how I feel...you're my hero too, dammit.

Uhuru said...

Sure, its always the blonde whitey from the prep school that gets all the attention.

Never the poor black girl from Africa who fought her way up to be communications officer.

Typical!

Spock said...

Heroism is illogical.

Anonymous said...

You made a decent pot of coffee today. I guess that qualifies as a hero. NOT.

your coworkers

Pennsylvania Surfer Dude said...

Yawww. You read my favorite mag, dude. Whatnot rules!

The Lone Beader said...

Corky, this post was simply brilliant. LOL

captain corky said...

This post has earned side bar status. Feel free to continue to comment on it for all of time!

Big Pissy said...

I shall....

hence....comment #125

James Burnett said...

Damn, Captain! I've gotta try this. I have a comment Jones too. But I've been lazy lately. You inspire me. I think I might go post right now.

kat said...

Ooh... I'm late on the reply of your question "what kind of wine are you drinking"... I'm usually drinking a blush. When it isn't wine it's Vodka or Rum.

Or Gin.

Or Tequila.

Slim 'The Trucker' said...

Hey. The way you cut off that grandma on the Turnpike was awe inspiring. So ya, heck, I'll admit it. You are my hero.

Slim 'The Trucker' Jones

dumb blonde said...

like, captain, I don't think I can comment on this for all of time. Like, I have to like, you know, work and eat and like sleep and stuff. you know?

but like ya! sure, you're my hero too

like xx

hot red head in the ferrari said...

Hi hunky,
I knew you were my hero the moment I looked in my rear view mirror and saw you through the haze of dust trailing behind me.

xx

Pennsylvania Surfer Dude said...

Waaah. You're totallly my hero dude. Could I could wear those awesome sunglasses of yours just once. You let Keith try them!

Keep cool, dude.

Pink said...

Yay!

I like the idea of a sidebar on this one. I want to come back and keep playing :-)

xx
pinks

Chucky said...

you had me at hello!

;)

I guess this means that I should leave you more comments. as long as you put them to good use I'm fine with that =)

erika said...

wow - i'm sorry i left before being able to see your reaction to receiving 130+ comments. i hope this is a sign of things to come...

Ms. Tuesday said...

sweet mother of fucking jesus....

Chucky said...

and one more before I go to work

whimsicalnbrainpan said...

Doing my part to keep this going.

Blogger Comment Verification Committee said...

We've received several complaints from various bloggers in the community, with 147 complaints being registered by someone by the name of birdman.

There are allegations of gratuitous uses of comment boxes and tampering with index cards.

This, along with the use of labour from 3rd world children is a serious investigable offence.

We're watching you!
xx
BCVC

Big Pissy said...

Oh, Cork!

Comment #138 sounds terribly serious!

Big Pissy said...

Comment #140 in not serious in anyway.

Chucky said...

What about #139?!

Pink said...

Hi Corky,

wow. you're fabulous.

did that do it for ya today?
xx
pinks

Ronald McDonald said...

What is this sidebar business?

I mean what are we...a side of fries?

Here we are pouring on the love...and we're just a part of your mchappy meal?

Well...as long as it makes you McHappy :)
xx
Ronnie

mjd said...

My,my, look at you. You have a zillion comments in this metaphorical box. Now, do you visit the blogs of each of these courageous persons and leave your gems of wisdom?

dr sardonicus said...

#145. Thought I'd come over from Sunshine's to add to the pile...

Comments are nice, but that stat counter down there at the bottom is where the real action's at. There's a lot of high-traffic blogs out there whose comment threads often don't make double digits.

Now that I've visited, I'll try to come back, and maybe even leave a comment once in a while...

captain corky said...

Dr Sardonicus: That kind of action doesn't really get my blood flowing. I can't really explain it. I wrote a post about Cat House a couple of months back, and it caused a severe spike in daily visitors. But I enjoy the affirmations I get from comments. It's all about the comments.

Thanks for stopping by, and especially for leaving a comment!

MJD: Of course. ;)

Ronald: Thanks for stopping by pal. Hopefully I won't be stopping by your place anytime soon.

we're right behind you said...

If you bring us donuts we will love you more

Your coworkers

Pink said...

I don't need donuts :-)
xx
pinks

captain corky said...

Me either Pinks. But the pregnant one bought some Ben and Jerry's Smores ice cream. I'm so weeeeeeeeeek.

Pink said...

Smores ice cream...oh my god...just the thought...I think I'm going to pass out from the excitement before I can finis

Sigmund Freud said...

I am a little concerned about yours and the birdman's need for competition and agressive animal (or bird, as the case may be) behaviour.

I have a space in my diary on Wednesdays at 3 pm for group counselling.

I strongly suggest you attend.

xx
Siggie

Pink said...

Hey we're over 150. Do you think we could get it to 200?

Pink said...

worth a try

Ms. Tuesday said...

Welcome to yet another edisode of Corky and Birdman's Big Dick Game!

There will inevitably be no winner, but enjoy the show anyway.

Pink said...

do birds have dicks?

and what about captain corky...i could have sworn he was a hermaphrodite in those tight black trousers the captains wear in the 22nd century

xx

Pink said...

oh wait...birds have peckers! Now it all makes sense!

xx
pinks

slim the trucker said...

sorry, men.

i have the biggest rig.

Slim,
(the trucker)

Pink said...

and then there were 3...

your coworkers said...

If you lose weight then you'll get on the boss's good side and pretty soon YOU'll be the boss and then we'll have to come in with written book reports on the latest cartoon character film every monday morning.

we just want to keep our heads down till at least noon and the boss doesn't notice that, right now.

hmmm

Corky? Want another donut?

xx
your coworkers

Sigmund Freud said...

what is this about dicks? Hmm...now things are getting very very interesting.

ms. tuesday appears to be having a classic case of penile envy.

I have a group appointment thursday at 4. Shall we just start billing directly to your medical insurer now?

xx
Siggie

Pink said...

Ok...I'm doing my part for the war effort.

161.

Pink said...

Geez. I need some help here PEOPLE!!!

162.

Ms. Tuesday said...

Oh let him suffer with ONLY 163 comments...

Blogger Comments Verification Committee said...

It has come to our attention that blogger is being swamped with traffic in what has been described as a Big Dick contest between this and a website of Meaty Proportions (but a bird for an avatar?)

We strongly advise you cease and desist with all activity as any further tampering with internet lines, index cards or comment boxes will be seen as a severe break of federal code 1274 subsection 998709s.2

You have been warned.

BCVC

Pink said...

165! woooo hoooo

Pink said...

OMG! Birdie's at 94!

I think he's been stuffing his ballot box himself a little, if you know what I mean ;)
xx
pinks

scotty said...

You say a birdman is chasing you? Warp speed captain? I dunna think she can take it, captain.

Aye captain...we'll give her all she's got.

scotty said...

just drop me in new mexico would ya, cap'n?

Pink said...

Good morning Corky.

Hope you are feeling good today.

Here's a comment to help.

"You're cool."

xx
pinks

Pink said...

ummm...corky...you have a birdman in hot pursuit.
xx
pinks

hot read head in the ferrari said...

oooh a hot pursuit! Now we're talking! ;)
xx

uhuru said...

It is absolutely typical of you men to do battle over who has the biggest dick.

And every time you fire a photon torpedo, who has to pick up the pieces and try to make the intergalactic peace with a federation hailing frequency?

The poor black girl from Africa. Always saving whitey's ass from his show of bravado.

Typical.

I'm not saving your ass this time, Captain. I'm no blogger.

Uhuru out

bones said...

for god's sake jim (err I mean Corky) do something!

dumb blonde said...

like you have a pet bird-man? like that's weird. What do you feed him?

like xx

Pink said...

Oh my god! I clicked away for just a second and here we are at 175!

Do you feel complete yet?
xx
pinks

leslie said...

I just about got instant carpal tunnel (instant karma tunnel?) from pulling the cursor down all 175 comments.
I think you SHOULD do the comments bumper sticker. That was not just peein' into the wind, my brother, That was a great idea. In your spare time, now that your kid is 3 weeks old, and able to take care of himself, you should see about developing a line of bumper stickers for anyone with a blog...How's my driving? commenttohttp://www.
Really. A great idea.
How's my commenting? Send your comments to...

Pink said...

Now that Kid Kreme is here...I think if you put him in the box, more of the girls would comment :)
xx
pinks

Anastasia said...

Vancouver = no fun city? Forget that. Enter NADATODO.COM. A new online events calendar I created that captures all there's to do in the city, NADATODO.COM is focussed on showcasing ALL events in Vancouver + its suburbs. Designed so users post their own events, the site is easy to use and looks great. When an event expires, hit the Past Events section and post your pics, video and comments.

Check it out. And spread the word. Your support is needed!

Thanks,
Anastasia