Sunday, August 12, 2007

Hamlet

I consider myself to be a gentlemen and a very well cultured individual, but It wasn't always this way... Before I watched episode 72 of Gilligan's Island, The Producer, I was on my best day, a street urchin. I had no class, no style and my socks never matched my shirts or shorts. Also, my shorts were obscenely skimpy and rode up my ass all the time. It wouldn't surprise me if my balls hung out of the side of my shorts when I was sitting down back then. But that was the 70's and that's what street urchins like myself were wearing. I probably looked a lot like this schmuck most of the time.

Episode 72 Of Gilligan's Island was basically a reproduction of Hamlet, first staring the Castaways and then starring a producer (played by Phil Silvers) who was looking for new talent, named Harold Hecuba. This is where I was first exposed to Shakespeare and his genius and that's when I realized there was more to life than uncomfortable tight fitting shorts, filth, and ignorance.

By the way, this is exactly why I love Gilligan's Island, and all of television for that matter. Two performances of Hamlet in one half hour episode, while eating dinner. Harold Hecuba played all the parts in Hamlet himself. Hamlet was a musical production on the Island and was actually set to the music of Carmen. Please note: The freak who wrote the review of The Producers on IMDB is a bigger freak than I am. At least in my opinion.Finally after 36 years later I've realized my dream and I'm happy to say that I produced my first film. I'm pretty proud of this piece, and am grateful to the Birdman for directing it. I also have to thank the hospital for letting me film on location. It only cost my small production company (Corky-Vision or CV) about 35 grand for the two weeks that we were there, but trust me, every dime was well worth it. Incidently, when I do wear shorts these days they fit and my balls stay in my pants.

Ladies and Gentlemen... Corky Jr


90 comments:

M said...

Enjoy every single precious moment of that beautiful baby because before you know it, he will be going to his senior year in high school. I know because it is happening to me! And oh, he just might be sassing you back too! Grin~ M

kat said...

I love Max. Those little hands, fingers curling in and out. That yawn! So tiny! I totally love this little guy!!!!

fiwa said...

What a beautiful baby! You just want to nibble on those sweet fingers. Hmm...maybe that's why no one ever asks me to babysit.
Congratulations!

HoosierGirl5 said...

What a doll! And Max is cute, too. (wink)

I loved it! MORE home movies, please!!!

J.

Jenny! said...

Great video! I love how little he is in your hands!

captain corky said...

M: I'm going to enjoy, and probably record every moment with him. He's so amazing.

Kat: I love Max too. He's so beautiful!!!

Fiwa: I actually really love to smell him. Sometimes at work I start to jones for a whiff of Max. But when I do smell him I like him to have a clean diaper of course. ;)

Hoosiergirl5: Thanks. ;) I plan on posting some feedings and maybe some other stuff. I'm also working on an infomercial starring the Birdman, but of course all of it is just in my mind right now.

Jenny: He's gotten a little bigger but not much. He also has a really strong grip.

nikki said...

What a cute kid.

By the way, I've never understood how there were guests on an island, and they would be able to leave, but the original castaways couldn't go anywhere.

erika said...

Best...Thing...Ever!

MarieMillard said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Nancy said...

Oscar Worthy!!!!

...and he has changed so much from this video.

abbagirl74 said...

Perhaps I should buy that Optimus Prime helmet for the little guy. He can grow up to enjoy it one day!

Lady K said...

All I got was a black screen with audio. Dang dial-up anyway! I WILL check this out when I get to MY computer at home. I'm working on my parents to get DLS AND cable TV. Sheesh. I feel like I've been transported to the dark ages over here. ha ha.

Max at least SOUNDS like a cutie in his first video...;-)

Lady K said...

LOL I meant to say DSL. I'm blaming it on the pain meds...

etain_lavena said...

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.......amazing...o and as always your so funny.
Keep safe.
HUGZ

Heart Of Darkness said...

We never got Gilligan's Island over here, so I don't get the fascination... enlighten me, 'cause an entire era of US culture has passed me by right here! LOL

Queen of Dysfunction said...

You are such a geek! Even without the ball-exposing shorts.

...but at least Corky Jr. is cute as a button.

The Lone Beader said...

Corky Jr. is so precious. Thanks for sharing your movie with us:)

Terri said...

oh boy did you set yourself up for being a bigger blogging fool than before; now not only do you have to write as well as pre-Max, you have to keep up with the beautiful "watch me grow" pictures and to add to that, more excellent movies! You dug the hole buddy! :o)

Peggy said...

I love how babies that small try to suck on everything and anything that gets near their cheeks or mouth. "Is this food?"

He's a champ Corky! You're obviously besotted.

Melissa said...

70's clothes were oh so special werent they? I should see if I can dig up any pics of you in those shorts! :-)

The video of Max is SO sweet and I look forward to more!

Tod said...

I've never seen Gilligan's Island or Hamlet. When I pay £35 a ticket to go to the theatre I expect there to be music, sequins and lots of high kicking.

But with that said your first movie is a masterpiece.

Camplin said...

Leave to Gilligan's Island to bring culture to the masses. Sitcoms are the drug of the masses and I often overdose.

jAMiE said...

Such a handsome little man...only wish you had smell-o-vision Corky...but only if he has a clean diaper...lovely film of father and son.

ps...SO happy to hear about your shorts fitting these days...i trust you don't wear a Speedo?

madame x said...

and the award goes tooooo:

Birdman, for his insiteful and in-depth directing and cinematography.

Max steals the show... Is Corky Jr. his stage name?

Gilligan would be proud of the whole production

Ashley said...

Great post! Love the video and links. Max is so cute!

I watched Gilligan's Island all of the time when I was younger. I don't recall the Hamlet episode. I was probably stuck in some Sweet Vally High stage and totally missed it. That show drove me crazy though, with how they were also building sinking ships, etc. How could they have had that many visitors and not gotten off for so long. Off of the island, I mean. :;

dilling said...

Take it to Sundance!!!
I preferred Maynard G. Krebs myself...

neroli said...

All right, Corky, so here I am, all ready to write along the lines of how much I find kitsch (like these hokey shows) to be actually really salient
and then you show us your film.
I'm blubbering---thanks for sharing with us.
I'll be wishing on a star during the meteor shower for that little guy and his parents tonight for sure!
PS---Your balls weren't showing during the film. Thanks!

gawilli said...

I'm with Dilling. It was Maynard for me too.

Boy has Max grown.

Abby J said...

CUUUUUTTEEEY!
And no, I don't mean you Corky. Ok, you too. But Max a little more.

Gina said...

He really is such a blessing, isn't he?

Such a quiet guy, mine was caterwauling all the time almost from the start. He is adorable! So happy for you and your wife!

Peggy said...

One other thing . . . I LOVED that particular episode of Gilligan's Island. Ever since the episode aired and to this day, if I ever hear "I ask to be or not to be" I always put it to the music of Carmen in my head. God Bless Phil Silvers!

Big Pissy said...

Max is such a lovely, lovely baby.

This video is sheer genius!

Thanks for sharing. :)

Jay said...

I certainly hope you weren't depriving him of any pre-season NFL action to do that video. ;-)

He looked like he was having a pretty good day there, but was ready to get a little shut-eye for a while.

That Mary Ann was a hottie.

Keshi said...

aww I wish I had a baby too...

Keshi.

Cazzie!!! said...

Dang it..you made me well up rightthere...little boys make me go all mushy mush I have to tell ya.

What A Crock said...

is that birdman's voice in the background makin coo'ing sounds to mightymax?

awww you guys are sooo cute. how proud are you~!?!

and dude.. seriously hands down one fo the best gilligan episodes was the hamlet production:p

captain corky said...

Nikki: Thanks! I feel very strongly that Gilligan's Island is a much more entertaining and realistic show than Lost. How do you feel about that?

Erika: Yes it is! Even better than... Star Trek. There, I said it.

Nancy: He really has gotten much bigger. It's incredible.

Abbagirl74: I think we both would enjoy it. ;) I plan on playing lots of games with him.

Lady K: I blame my 20's on pain meds. Tell your parents to come out of the cave already. ;)

captain corky said...

Etain: Thanks! Feeding him and holding him is really amazing. I Hope all is well with you. ;)

Heart: It's hard to explain, but a lot of Americans my age and a bit older were raised by crap like Gilligan's Island instead of parents. LOL

Queen: You're making me blush by calling a geek. ;) Thanks!

Beader: Glad you enjoyed the video. Plenty more to come. :)

Terri: I've been digging my way in and out of holes my whole life. I'm pretty used to it at this point. And if I ever start to run out of material... It'll be time to knock up Allyson again. ;)

captain corky said...

Peggy: Funny you should say that, Corky Jr tried to eat my arm this morning. ;)

Melissa: Thank god kids are dressed with class now. I hope that never changes! Plenty more to come. I promise. ;)

Tod: Thanks! When I spend 35 bucks I hope to see guys slapping each other on the ass and beating the shit out of each other, but actually tickets like that start more at 75 dollars.

Camplin: I'm passed the point of no return as far as TV addiction goes. I plan on being buried with a remote control in about 70 years or so.

Welcome to the log!

Jamie: Never have I or will I wear a Speedo, especially since I'm not an Olympic swimmer. Thank you for the kind words Jamie. :)

captain corky said...

Madame X: Corky Jr is his stage and pen name. Soon he'll be starting his own blog, but not quite yet. ;)

Ashley: Thanks! I could right a pretty lengthy post about Gilligan's Island, but then I wouldn't be talking about me, and that's no fun. ;)

Dilling: I like Dobie and Maynard very much. That show was ahead of it's time.

Neroli: Thank you. That's very touching. And no problem about my balls... I like to keep them in many layers of pants these days. At the very minimum two. ;)

Gawilli: Max really has sprouted, hasn't he?

captain corky said...

Abby J: Max is definitely cuter than me, and I don't say that about many people at all. ;)

Gina: He really is. I love telling Allyson all about your son. He's the funniest kid in the world. No joke!

Peggy: I absolutely love the Phil Silvers show. Ernie Bilko is one of my influences. ;)

Pissy: Glad you liked it. We put a lot of work into creating the star. ;)

Jay: We've been watching Pre-Season football, and Star Trek everyday for the last two weeks or so. I don't buy into that bullshit about reading and playing music for babies. ;)

captain corky said...

Keshi: Baby is the most amazing thing that ever happened to me. Really.

Cazzie: I try my best. ;)

What a Crock: "Mighty Max" I like it... A lot!!!

karma lennon said...

Amazing first film! :) That little guy is too too adorable! Totally made my morning seeing him being all cute!

Nikki said...

I don't watch Lost, so I don't care. :)

Speaking of preseason football, I'm liking the chargers uniforms, but not the white helmets. Glad they aren't one of my teams. I'm mildly addicted to football. I just watch it because it's on, but I CAN miss it.

Motor City Monk said...

Max is quite the little munchkin there. Nothing better than holding your newborn baby - all the other shit seems so meaningless.

RockDog said...

Cool flick, Captain! The Special Effects were hardly noticable!!! Great job!

GO COWBOYS!

her indoors said...

what a great first film, we await for part 2, part 3, think this one could go on and on, hope so anyway!
glad your balls behave these days lol

Christie said...

Remember that party in Jackass the movie when Johnny Knoxville wears short shorts and has a pair of fake balls hanging out and all the dogs were trying to bite them off. I know you don't look like that, but that is what I envision. Sorry.

AND....your son is adorable! That video is too cute and now I'm jonesing for a baby.

CRUSTYBEEF said...

ahh, Gilligan's Island..I always wanted to Be Maryanne for some reason..

what a great video..how'd you guys do that? I'm not savvy in the computer sense as you prolly already know.

Max is precious and someday when this is considered ancient "blogging and cassette tapes?" this will be a wonderful tribute for him to look back upon with his wife-your daughter in law..
suddenly you're breaking out in sweats aren't you?
Look at it this way, the bride's family will cover the wedding. :)
Always,
Crusty~

Jenny! said...

So do you want to kick my ass since icalled you out on being a dork???

TheBirdman33 said...

I think what really makes that video work is the behind the scenes work.

He is a cutie and I can't wait to see you guys again in a few weeks

captain corky said...

Karma Lennon: Thanks for kind words. I really appreciate them.

Nikki: I never watch Lost either. It's not for me. Football on the other hand I can't live without.

Motor City Monk: Yeah it does. Holding him is an amazing experience every time.

Rockdog: Thanks pal, and fuck the Cowboys!

Her Indoors: For the most part yy balls mostly behave these days. ;) I hope to put another video up later this week.

captain corky said...

Christie: Believe it or not I never saw Jackass the movie. All you have to do is spread your legs when Hubby comes home from work. :)

Crustybeef: Maryanne was smokin hot. It's pretty easy up load a video. It's almost the same as uploading a pic to your blog.

And I do like the fact that I won't have to pay for his wedding, but I better start saving up for the rehearsal dinner. ;)

Jenny: Nah... It turns me on actually.

Birdman: Thanks for the kind words. Max looks forward to seeing you too.

Canadian flake said...

awwwwwww that Max is such a hunka hunka burnin love **cue Elvis music**

Very nice video

Burfica said...

that is almost as adorable as a little of puppies. awwwwwwwwww Nicely done.

Metal Mark said...

Yes, definitely keep your balls in your pants.

Pink said...

Yum! He's a delight!xx pinks

captain corky said...

Canadian Flake: I wonder if Kentucky Rain will be one of Max's favorite songs. It's one of mine for sure.

Burfica: Thanks. He was almost as small as a little puppy too.

Metal Mark: Not a problem. ;)

Pink: I agree 1000 percent. :)

whimsicalnbrainpan said...

One of the best movies I've seen in a while. The little leading man was adorable!

I have a signal! It is sketchy (don't know how long it will hold) and not the one from the school, but it's a welcome sight (as is your blog).

Webmiztris said...

that was worth every bit of the 35 grand. :)

Blancodeviosa said...

what a cutie max is!!! :)

Pixie said...

Awwww you look so proud, you could have slipped a shorts shot in there too perhaps and really made my day ;)


Max is perfect!

For the record I have never watched Gilligan's Island, haven't a clue what its about either sorry.

Biddie said...

Wow. THAT was a true masterpiece! what a gorgeous kid!

Gilligans Island brings back painful memories for me. My brother and I got into an argument over the TV, he wanted to watch Gilligan, and I didn't. I ended up smashing a potato over his head..It blew up into a million little pieces.
SIGH....

I miss my brother. Good times, man, good times.

Biddie said...

BTW, I am back among the land of the living. You can rejoice now.

The Artist formerly Known as Purpleworms (!) said...

ZHamlet, Hamlet do be a lamblet..." Can't forget that classic!!

Christie said...

Since my husband threatened to kick my ass down the stairs if I EVER got pregnant again, I don't I'll try that. I also don't have the parts to make a baby anymore.

But, seriously, if any of you ever hear that I "fell" down the stairs, it's because I somehow got pregnant, and my husband pushed me. I'm not kidding.

Heidi the Hick said...

awww!!!!!

I loved Gilligan's Island. (guess I won't be watching it Biddie's house though.)

Keep track of all the video dude. Label it all. Once you get to your second kid you'll be so confused! and yes there will be a second one. Babies are habit forming.

Jenny! said...

So you would be okay with my Superwoman underwear and matching bed sheets?

PunditMom said...

Congratulations on Max, oh, and the film, too! Plus, I applaud any other fan of the Gilligan's Island "cultural" episode. All my classical education came from that episode and Bugs Bunny (Kill the Wabbit, Kill the WAB-bit!)

leslie said...

So 30 seconds at 35 grand...what did the Gilligan's Island budget per episode work out to be?

Josie said...

Okay, that is officially the most beautiful little human being I have ever seen. :-)

Diesel said...

Awww, that's just freaking adorable. Congrats on the beautiful baby.

Chucky said...

awww he's already a star =)

Pud said...

That video is sooo adorable!

Princess Pointful said...

He's obviously not as besotted with the camera as you claim to be... and all the delightful and charming for it!

eric1313 said...

Man, Gilligan's island brings back the memories of sitting home sick from school, or sick od school, rather, with my grandma. Great times and no worries.
--
You have been awarded.

captain corky said...

Whim: Great to see you! I hope your signal is here to stay.

Webmiztris: It really was... I can't find it inside myself to complain about how obscene a 35,000 dollar hospital bill is for a two week stay.

Blancodeviosa: Just like his Dad, right? ;)

Pixie: Some people might tell you that you that it's a good thing that you've never seen and episode of Gilligan's Island... but not me. ;)

Biddie: I'm sure glad I never crossed you before. Glad you're feeling better.

captain corky said...

Purpleworms: That's one of my biggest problems. I never forget any of that stuff and think about it wayyyyyyyyyy too much. ;)

Christie: Maybe you should think about moving into a house without stairs when you guys move to Seattle. Just a something to think about. ;)

Heidi: If all goes right I'll have at least 3 kids. With lots of videos, and action figures and toys etc. ;)

Jenny: LOL! Do you have a magic lasso too?

Punditmom: Welcome to the log! I learned how to fuck with people from bugs. That greatest master of them all.

captain corky said...

Leslie: That I'm not sure of, but we could write a letter to Loyd Scwarts (Sherwood's son) and ask him. ;)

Josie: Thank you for those kind words. And welcome to the log!!!

Diesel: Thank you very much my friend.

Chucky: I hope he doesn't grow up to be another Garry Coleman.

Pud: Thank you. We worked very hard on it. ;)

captain corky said...

Princess: He's more besotted with his bottle and his pacifier right now. ;)

Eric1313: Exactly! When I would come home from school I would put down my books, make a snack, and turn on Gilligan's Island. Life was perfect then.

mjd said...

Corky you have created a fabulous production with the best starring cast ever. Gilligan's Island and Phil Silvers brings back a flood of memories. You must really like oldtime television. Do like any of the current programming?

Cheryl said...

I stayed with a guy for 2 years cause of his balls hanging out of his shorts. Ouch, did I really say that? It's true.

So glad to finally see a picture of you. Nice...

Jenny! said...

No...but I do have a magic stick!

captain corky said...

MJD: I love all television. Old and new alike. I even like future television. I'm not real crazy about Reality TV, but I like the Surreal Life and washed up actor reality shows. I'm probably going to have to address this question in a post some time. ;)

Cherly: I need to know more about this at some point. ;)

Jenny: LOL

Chucky said...

Dang captain. How do you reply to all of these comments?!

You must be some kind of super captain. Captain America? Captain Planet?... They got nothing on you ;)

Aunt Jackie said...

Yes it must be nice to have so many comments to reply to...

Hey I love the addition of Video--you guys look GREAT.

captain corky said...

Chucky: When Max sleeps I screw around on the computer. I watch him when I come home frrom at 5: am until 12 or 1. Than Allyson takes over.

Aunt Jackie: Thank you. I love the video.

Debs said...

How sweet he is with the tiny fingers...awwww.

milk&honey said...

Ooowwww, my ovaries!!

Bob said...

As the schmuck in the photo that you linked to -- allow me to just say "ouch!"

My fashion sense never really improved, by the way.