No but seriously... I worry about my kid. A lot. Obviously I worry about all the real world bullshit that might affect him one day, but that goes without saying. I also worry about all the things a new parent worries about: Is he too hot? Is he too cold? What are those fucking noises he's making? He's not sick is he? Did he eat enough? Is he eating too much? etc. I haven't asked this many questions since Spock died at the end of Star Trek II, the Wrath of Kahn for Pete's sake!
All those worries are enough to give someone an ulcer already, but what I really worry about... I'm talking about the kind of shit that wakes me up in the middle of the day in a cold sweat type of shit (I work at night) is, What happens if Max becomes another fucking Arnold Drummond?
What I haven't told you is that a picture of Max is going to replace the bear on the Similac can in their 2007 "Knock your wife up" Christmas campaign. Also, he's slated to play Angelina Jolie's 23rd adopted kid from a third world county. In the movie Angelina's character goes all the way into Louisville Kentucky to retrieve this kid. It's a very touching movie.
Max is going to be making some serious cash folks! So I worry... Will he grow up to become a former childhood star asshole like Mccully Culkin or even worse... Corey Feldman? Will he sue me and try to get the courts to emancipate him at 16 because I spent all of his money on action figures? That would suck if Max turned out to be that annoying. I think I would have to disown him. I can't even imagine him becoming as annoying as Corey Feldman is.
However, he could also turn out like Ron or Clint Howard did. That would make me very proud. Those boys were raised right. That reminds me, I'm going to have to call Ron in a couple of weeks and get some parenting tips.
But, then again maybe a career in Hollywood just isn't meant to be. I wont be disappointed if Max winds up doing something else with his life. I'll love him no matter what he does.
In the meantime here's another movie produced by Corky Vision. Please Note: Corky Jr is a little older in this piece and Allyson's voice makes her debut on to the silver screen.