Thursday, September 06, 2007

The Birdman Cometh, Again.

The Birdman had so much fun spending time with Captain Corky Jr in July that him, his dog, and his dog's 50 pound back of dog food are back for the week. Max and I were so excited about him coming that we even scrubbed the toilet a couple of hours before he got here. I have a minor addiction when it comes to cleaning my bathroom with Clorox and scrubbing my toilet. Some of you knew that about me already while others of you just learned this right now. Other notable addictions I've had include: drinking, gambling, blogging, dieting, smoking/dipping, compulsive masturbating, eating, fishing, exercising and my all time favorite, watching TV. As it turns out I was never really addicted to any of that shit. It was all in my head. Feel free to play along at home kids! Print this page out and circle as many compulsive behaviors as you can and then you can pretend that you're Captain Corky.

Speaking of diets, I was doing really good on the one that I started late Monday night until the Birdman got here early Tuesday morning, and made me eat at Cracker Barrel Tuesday night, and then again yesterday when we went for bacon cheese burgers at W.W. Cousins. It pisses me off that the Birdman was so adamant about eating out, because I was going to make a nice soy salad for us for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. And then for desert we were going to have oats. But I really can't complain too much about the Birdman... after all he was kind enough to let me finish off the box of chocolate chip cookies he bought yesterday at Rite Aid. Plus, he's done a good job of helping me and Allyson take care of Jr this week. That counts for everything around here.

Jr went to see the doctor yesterday and got 3 or 4 shots. He didn't feel good at all when he got home. :( The Doctor says he looks really good though. He is exactly where he's supposed to be weight wise at 12 pounds. He's a little on the short side right now at 22 inches, but I'm sure he's going to grow like a weed and when he grows up he should be approximately 210 pounds and 6 feet, 2 inches... Just like Batman.

Finally I would like to wish everybody a very happy and healthy NFL 2007 Kickoff Thursday. I'm picking the Colts to beat New Orleans tonight in a high scoring affair. But I wouldn't bet the kid's college trust fund on my prediction.


Cazzie!!! said...

I hate it when they get needles..Mia had her pre school injections a few weeks back and I still never got used to it after 4 kids!

Cazzie!!! said...

Oh, our footy season is almost at a close. The Grandfinal comes up in a few weeks time. Crocket starts for the Summer and Tennis too.

Biddie said...

Sounds like you and The Birdman are having fun.
I wouldn't worry about dieting..At 12 lbs, Max should be just about the right size for arm curls now...That has to knock a few calories off, right? Lift him over your head a few times through out the day - there go more calories! Nowe you're free to eat all the cookies and burgers you want with Batman - er - Birdman.
(that kid is TOO cute)

karma lennon said...

Cracker Barrel is the best!!! Yum! :) And I have my own massive list of compulsive behaviours-a few of which match yours.

RockDog said...

Did he bring any strippers with him?

Cheryl said...

Today starts my diet. That is, if I can throw away the last of the ice cream. All the clothes are too tight.

Jessica said...


I think it's cute that you post so many photos of your son. Proud daddies are sexy!

captain corky said...

Cazzie: My wife took him because I work at night and was sleeping. He's pretty fussy this morning. I hate to see him uncomfortable it breaks my heart.

Biddie: Having Birdman around is a lot of fun. I've been friends with him since we were very young. The only real problem I have with him is that he doesn't drink enough. Oh well... Nobody's perfect.

Karma: I've never met anyone that doesn't have issues. Although, Max is pretty close. ;)

Rockdog: Unfortunately all he brought was his mangy dog. LOL

Cheryl: As soon as the Birdman heads off to see his brother in Indy mine starts too. I just bought one of those exercise balls, and my wife will never let me down if I don't use it.

captain corky said...

Jessica: Thanks! You keep saying things like that and I might have to reevaluate all Eagle fans. ;)

Palm Springs Savant said...

I'm with you on the addictions (except the smoking/dipping part). I too am a compulsive cleaner/germ-o-phobe! With Corky Jr around you must constantly be scrubbing!

Go Colts!


abbagirl74 said...

Yeah for football! It sucks that I have season tickets for one of the worst teams this year. Oh well. Go CHIEFS!!!

Sunshine said...

Just like Batman.
But Robin was cuter. I think Batman probably got more chicks though.


Sorry, but The Saints are going to get the Colts by 7over...
Good luck with your FF players,tonight..hope you have some good ones.

Shots...hurts us parents worse than the children..until they end up ill 7days later with a fever that makes you think, "QUICK, to the batcave, batman, we must get Robin to the ER..." it sucks...but it's just side affects.

Hope the little guy feels better soon. and Birdman accepts your soy salad with love and passion. :)

Jay said...

Good job by Jr. to tough it out taking those shots. Any other kid would be crying for days.

I'm expecting a lot of action in tonights game. Lots of points and lots of big plays.

And don't forget Kelly Clarkson is performing in the pre-show. That's pretty hot!

captain corky said...

Palm Springs Savant: Jr is a pretty clean baby. He definitely doesn't get his tidiness from him Mommy or Daddy.

Abbagirl74: I'm going to see the Chiefs play the Colts on November 18th. I can't wait!!!

Sunshine: Batman got Catwoman a couple of times. Now she's hot!!!

Crusty: Jr's been taking some sugar coated Tylenol per the Doctor's instructions. He's also been sleeping all day. Except when he eats. I hope he feels better soon.

Jay: The game is going to be great! I need lots of points from Dallas Clark and Anthony Gonzales.

Christie said...

I hate taking the kids for shots. They hate me for days afterwards.

Would you break up with me if I told you I thought Birdman was Hawkman? They look kind of alike, right?

Metal Mark said...

Happy NFL Kickoff day to you too! I agree about your prediction. Both teams have some defense issues, but I think the offenses will light it up and the Colts will win by about 10 points.

Guilty Secret said...

Birdman sounds like a fun guy.

What is dipping?

TheBirdman33 said...

Thanks Guilty Secret, I am a pretty fun guy.

TheBirdman33 said...

I was ok with Corky eating my Nantucket Chocolate Chip Cookies but waking up to an empty box of Frosted Flakes is UNACCEPTABLE!

TheBirdman33 said...

Rockdog, I don't like to TRAVEL with strippers, they aren't good in the car I figured I would find new ones when I got here!

Emmeline said...

That's right, blame your inability to stick to a diet on the birdman! It IS all his fault!


Emmeline said...

PS - Guilty Secret, dipping is chewing tobacco.


Bonnie Blue said...

Ok, first of needles suck so I feel for Jr. I still have issues with the needles and I got plenty of years on Jr.

Second...nothing wrong with compulsions. it gonna get all messy in here because of football season? If so, I gotta say it now. Being the NYer I am, Giants for me...BUT...I have a soft spot for the 49ers...don't basically goes back to watching Steve Young look hot. I can take all the football banter but I refuse to listen to any baseball banter that has anything negative to say about the Yankees. Just sayin. You you know how I am. ;)

Nancy said...

Awe, I hated those trips to the Dr. for shots ... but his little face looks so sweet!

I swear I am ADD and OCD ... I can't sit still and things have to be clean and in order ... I think I drive everyone else crazy!

etain_lavena said...

look at his face when you bet his college fund....gosh dad...:)

and being a addict is basicly everybodies problem...,mine is chocolate...drule...ok I can move on....I entered a writting competition...when it is voting time, will you get ppl to vote for me....preddy please:)....grovel grovel...I will send you doobie;)

HAR said...

That picture is adorable. I miss when my babies were infants. The shot part I don't miss at all.

Football is probably on channel 2 right? My G Damn reality show is on tonight. SOB.

Since when is Thursday a football night? Am I behind a few years ?

My drink goes up tonight at 7:00. At 7:00 I am drinking to my friend Queenie in England if you care to join me.

Aunt Jackie said...

Well, happy NFL Kickoff indeed! Wow didn't fall get here quick this year?? It's like time is on a landslide anymore... I love this photo of Corky, Jr... it needs a caption above it... hmmm (thinking)...

Anyways, hang in there, Dieting is hard... actually you can't think of it as dieting. You just have to change your lifestyle to "healthy" and forgive yourself the occasional indulgence, and above all--stay active. If you don't use it, you'll lose it.

Gina said...

We don't have any Cracker Barrels around here that I know of, am I missing out on some sort of culinary delight? Are you trying to tell me that Kentucky has better food than LA?

mjd said...

Wow, that is shame that you were forced to eat at Cracker Barrel instead of eating the ah...delicious soy salad. Were you forced to have dessert like blackberry cobbler or apple dumpling too?

My bathroom could use some Clorox and toilet scrubbing. Anytime you feel the urge to scrub, drive on up to da Region. We have two bathrooms.

Athena-Liana Smith said...

The most succesful step to dieting is to turn a negative feeling into a positive. The negative feeling is hunger. Every time it hits you, turn it into something positive. Say "A ha! I am winning over fat!" For hunger, especially persistent hunger, signals your victory over fat. Think positive!

The baby is gorgeous!


DAMN IT...Colts are winning 7nothing..but it's only the first quarter..and I'm drinking wine, watching football with my bigdog, and having fun "married" bets.. :)

Jenny! said...

Cutest picture of all time! Perfect timing! As far as him being a shorty...there ain't nothing wrong with short people! My boy would alternate his growing...he would grow wide (and look so fucking chubby)and then grown tall (and thin out) will all even itself out eventually!

Birdman is a bad influence...but I would make you go out too if the option was a fucking soy shit ass salad!

Heidi the Hick said...

I CAN NOT understand why he wouldn't want to eat at your house!

(whew I just busted out some sarcasm! I gotta go lie down...)

I love the look on Max's is such a total surprise, man!

Alekx said...

Love how your arm was twisted to eat burgers.

whimsicalnbrainpan said...

Were do you live again, 'cause my bathroom needs cleaning.

Happy Football Season to you!

Jerrster said...

you kidding after seeing the game and the score of the colts/pats game...maybe we need to talk about your keen sense for calling football games....ehhhhhhh$$$$$$$$


Beefcake Almighty said...

Ah, to hell with football.

The Rugby World Cup starts soon.

Viva La All Blacks.

I'll explain later.

You clean your toilet before people come over? Hell, I make sure to use it just before people show up.

captain corky said...

Christie: No, as a matter of fact I like you even more because you can name both of them. You know how Superhero talk always gets me excited. ;)

Metal Mark: After watching this game I'm really impressed with the increased speed on defense for the Colts. They look great!

Guilty Secret: Birdman's a pretty good guy. Dipping is Chewing tobacco, a very nasty habit that I engaged in for 15 years or so.

Birdman: Thanks for the cereal. Since you didn't buy anymore I guess you'll just have to take us out for breakfast this morning.

captain corky said...

Emmeline: It's always somebody else's fault. ;)

Bonnie Blue. I grew up 20 minutes from New York so most of my friends are Jets and Yankees fans. I don't really follow baseball at all, but as you can tell from reading I worship football.

I do have one friend that's Giant fan, but despite that he's still one of my best friends.

Nancy: Luckily Allyson took him, but sooner or later I'm going to be the one that has to do the dirty work.

Etain: Of course I'll will support you. No need to beg at all.

Har: They've only been doing the Thursday night kick off for a couple of years. IF they could the NFL would show games 7 days a week, but then there would be a lot of unemployed people in this country. We heart Football.

her indoors said...

max sure is thriving, you just trying to keep up with him in gaining weight huh!

captain corky said...

Aunt Jackie: I know... I've got to come to terms with the fact that I can't eat like I'm 17 years old anymore. Plus, I need to get moving cause pretty soon Jr is going to be flying.

Gina: Cracker Barrel is as good as it gets out here (with the exception of a Korean and Japanese restaurant). Other than that the food in Kentucky is some of the worst on earth. LOL

MJD: I think we bought fudge brownies, but who can remember anymore that was 1000's of calories ago. ;)

Athena-Liana Smith: Thanks for the kind words about the kid! I'm a very positive person. And I take complete responsibility for my own actions, but it's not my fault that the Birdman is such a bad influence on me.

Thanks for stopping by the log.

Crustybeef: Sounds like a great way to watch football. We watched with wings and food for BW3's Wild Wings. Yum.

captain corky said...

Jenny: Thanks! I would never really eat fucking soy shit ass salad. ;)

Heidi: LOL Only squirrels and rabbits would want to eat at my house if I was really serving that crap. Is Soy salad even real?

Alekx: Just like my arm is being twisted to suck down this coke I'm drinking. ;)

Whim: I live in KY. Not too far from NC, right? ;)

Jerrster: If had a dime for every dime I ever used gambling... I'd have a lot more dimes.

captain corky said...

Beefcake Almighty: We castrate people around here for bad talking football.

Her Indoors: I better chill out. I saw some youngling at a restaurant the other day moving at blinding speeds.

RockDog said...

Birdman! You are the man with the plan! LOL!

Captain! Why did not one tell em that Kelly Clarkson was kicking off the NFL season??? I love her...ass. Please keep me informed as to such things in the future.


RockDog Unleashed! Saturdays @ Midnight!

Pink said...

I think you actually have to HAVE a trust fund before you can bet it.


BIgdog loves BW3's..until we found a better place: WING STOP!! Parmesan Garlic, and HOT HOT HOT!! Even the fries rock..

Your team prevailed this time, but what's on your radar for this weekend for the games?

Crusty~ :)

Tod said...

It's good to meet up with old friends for dinner. My old friends all hate me all the more burgers for me!

Enemy of the Republic said...

My office mate is from New Orleans and he is so depressed today.

Lucy said...

I feel like I've stepped into a domesticated version of Adult Swim--am I wrong in that assessment

Confession: I, too, am a compulsive cleaner.

Feel free to stop by and clean up my corner of the blogosphere. If not perhaps writing a comment will help you with your compulsive blogging habit.

Nice coming across your blog!

eric1313 said...

What's up Captian?

The Birdman sounds like a good friend (freinds don't let friends lose weight--it would make them look bad!).

I can't help but agree with beefcake...

but then again, I'm in Detroit. I'm still waiting for profesional football to reutrn to this city.

I was at the bad ass fire millen game, when half of Ford Field's employee were sent to chase after a guy with a hand drawn fire Millen sign on a paper bag. It was shameful, especially because everone in the stadium was only watching the drama of the chase, while eight to ten entitre plays and two changes of possesion went unnoticed. It was hillarious and sad all wrapped into one.

fiwa said...

Aww..I love that picture of Mr. Man at the bottom - that suprised look on his face is priceless.

neroli said...

Corky, come on!
I'm vegetarian, and I wouldn't eat soy salads :)!
carpe diem, dear Captain!

Keshi said...

shots? :(


captain corky said...

Rockdog: I promise I'll never let you down again Rockdog. I

Pink: The bookies never seemed to mind that I didn't have a trust fund until after I lost my bet... ;)

Crusty: I may have to hit BW3's on Sunday so that I can see the Jets play New England.

Tod: Most of my friends live 700 miles away from me so it's pretty easy to stay in their good graces.

Enemy of the Republic: Did he come to work with you guys after Katrina? We have a guy at work who got transferred to Louisville after the big storm. He's one of the nicest guys I ever met.

captain corky said...

Lucy: Thanks for stopping by! I'm not sure what we are around here, but we have a lot of fun.

I look forward to reading your blog. ;)

Eric1313: Someday all of Detroit's fans dreams will come true, and the Lions will win more than 5 games, but probably not this year. LOL

Fiwa: Thanks! It just seems like the camera never stops flashing when Max is around. I wonder why that is... :)

Neroli: It's 9:56 AM, I hope I'm not too late. ;)

Keshi: The only kind of shots we like around here are the one's that are filled with 80 proof or higher. ;)

BottleBlonde said...

To hell with diets! Just join the rest of us fatties and die with honor (a.k.a. diabetes).


TELL ME you're not a JET's fan!!

So, are you choking on a chicken bone from BW3's, while drinking your superhero drink, as you watch The Hurricanes get spanked by Oklahoma? Pity...THE U BABEEEEEEE!!

kat said...

Your posts always crack me up. I'm either laughing loudly or at the very least sitting with a dopey smile on my face. You make very good use of the "..." technique. Not many people can do it properly. As an expert on the "..." I can assure you that you use it very effectively!

I was driving today and passed a construction site and someone had spray painted COLTS RULE in blue on the side of the unfinished building. Thought you'd like to know you have the support of a vandalist here in New York.

mike martz said...

we will win more than 5 games this year. my offense will not be denied.

The Lone Beader said...

Great. Now I'm craving Cracker Barrel Chicken-fried Steak. LOL.

Jay Cam said...

i HATE needles...last time i had to get shot i hit the doc in the i dont think im gonna go back EVER again.... needles=bad

Jay Cam said...

Care to trade links? My site is

If would like to trade, post my link, then comment or email me and I will post yours on my site as a permanent link. Send what you want to your link to be called and your link please.
I would appreciate the linkage, thanks!

captain corky said...

Here are my pics for tomorrow, and Monday:

Pit @ Cle: Pit over Clevland
Mia @ Was: Miami over Was
Phi @ GB: Phi over GB
Den @ Buf: Den over Buf
KC @ Hou: KC over Houston
Ten @ Jac: Ten over Jac
NE @ NYJ: NE over Jets
Car @ Stl: Stl over Car
Atl @ Min: Min over Atl
Chi @ SD: SD over Chi
TB @ Sea: Sea over TB
Det @ Oak: Oak over Det
NYG @ Dal: Dal over NYG
Bal @ Cin: Bal over Cin
Ari @ SF: Ari over SF

Those are my pics for tomorrow, and Monday.

captain corky said...

Bottleblonde: Diets sucks ass. I'm drinking a tall glass of coke right now in defiance.

Crusty: At this point I really just like football and watching good teams play. My first team was the Bills and I'm still heart broken over those Super Bowls.

Kat: Thanks! I've got lots of connections in NY so It was probably one of my peeps. ;)

Mike Martz: The Vikings actually looked pretty decent in preseason. They may be this year's sleeper team.

Beader: A very popular meal down here in the South.

Jay Cam: Thanks for stopping by. We're always looking for new friends.

etain_lavena said...

Thanks Al is the link, winning depends on votes....

Enjoy sunday.....

Canadian flake said...

lol gnome said to tell ya you are full of beans ...Denver will not beat Buffalo..

did I mention I HATE football season??

But I AM a devoted trekkie so ya still love me right? LOL.

Ashley said...

Was that Corky, Jr.'s look of disbelief while you were joking about eating soy products? Do they even sell soy in Kentucky?

Cute picture, as always.

What A Crock said...

awww he's too damned cute! you tell birdman i said that!

max is too.


hey.. i missed reading your blog so i decided to catch up. hah