Thursday, February 28, 2008

Another Very Special Message from willSix


Hello once again, fellow corksters. As none of you no doubt know, after eight years of toil in the Information Technology industry, I decided to change careers. Accordingly, I took the stinking LSAT and enrolled at the Fordham Law School, Evening Division. Now, after four years of night school and twelve years as "the IT guy", I am now "the Intern". Legal Intern might sound a whole lot less impressive than IT Director, but hey, it's not the size of the wand, but the motion in the ocean...or something like that.

Anyhoo, in honor of my new internship (and because our bloggy Captain has not yet noticed that I locked out the bridge of the USS CorkysLog and rerouted control to Engineering), I thought I'd share with you a few of the silver screen inspirations for my newfound career.

First, the greatest contract negotiation ever captured on film:



Next: Greatest.Opening.Statement.Ever.



Finally, pretty much every-attorney-I-ever-met's favorite lawyer and, without question, the greatest closing statement in the history of cinema:



Please note the utter lack of Tom Cruise in uniform (or Tom Cruise in general, for that matter) or anything related to John Grisham. Peace.
___________________________________________________________

willSix, continuing:

I can't believe I forgot this, the best defense known to man:



And, by popular request: if you're gonna get held in contempt, this is the way to go.

30 comments:

Mike said...

OOOO you gonna be a slimy lawyer!

Good luck!

furiousBall said...

i think the size of the ocean does matter tho

Real Live Lesbian said...

What furiousball said. ;)

Bonnie Blue said...

Oy...law school...3 years of my life I wish I could have back. I try to convince everyone I meet who thinks they want to go to law school not too. hehe...I HATE practicing...did it for 6 mos with legal aid and I was done. I guess the piece of paper is worth something though...

Congrats on making it through...now the real fun begins....studying for the bar....I won't scare you with my gory details. Though I will tell you that the NY and the NJ bar exams and I don't get along...AT ALL. Nope...not bitter.....yeah I am.

Jay said...

What, no Matlock? Sure, he was TV, and those guys were in movies, but still. He was pretty good.

The Lone Beader said...

LOL. There is a lot of truth to that contract negotiation. LOL.

katie said...

you rock, mister intern!! god, i love And Justice For All.....al pacino is my all time fave actor. "the one thing that stayed in my mind was why!! why would she lie!! what was her motive for lying! was it blackmail!! NO. was it jealousy! no! yesterday, i found out why! she doesn't have a motive. do you know why? becuz she's not lying!!"

total bad ass. love that scene!

Good luck with it all, Corkster!

Farmer*swife said...

You gave up "Tech" for "Law"? Wait...more importantly, you can go to law school at night?

Yea, my last job {where I actually got paid} I own'ed a litigation record procurement business. My DH would curse the [local plaintiff] attorney(s) and their commercials. I'd say "HEY! That's my bread and butter!" Now? He's my bread and butter -- so I let him curse away!

No really though. Law is turnin' all media and paper thin now days. So, your IT ed will enhance your law degree -- whoo, hit the bars! What a catch you are!

captain corky said...

That's nothing Will! I once gave up a very promising career pumping gas to move to Washington DC. When I was in my mid 20's and didn't have a child at home and wasn't married. Beat that!

Congrats! I'm glad the nightmare of working, commuting, and going to school all in the same day is finally coming to an end.

Now you'll have more time for Corky's log and other STUFF. ;)

dilling said...

good for you...my good friend just became a lawyer this year. We're 40-ish now. Follow your dreams and you will remain "young" forever.
and Atticus Finch is one of my top ten heroes(and he is a fictional character)...if I ever had a boy, I would name him Atticus. If I had a girl, I'd name her Scout. If I had a second child, whatever the sex, I'd name it Boo Radley. I would. I am not just saying that.

HoosierGirl5 said...

Okay, I'm going to reveal my movie ignorance: what is the middle clip from? I know I should know it, but I don't.

Good stuff. You can't beat Atticus Finch.

J.

MoneyMan said...

Willsix rocks. For 4 years: career (a 10 hour a day job & on-call). Raising a baby (helping a great wife). Law school 4 nights a week (and study time whenever....)

BTW: Greatest summation closing line: From the late great Ass"t D.A. Benny Schmeer of Brooklyn, in murder cases:

(Pointing at the defendabts) Thgese men! They cameta plundah, and stayed to moidah!

Casdok said...

Good for you!

Guilty Secret said...

Ha ha @ "Let's get back to justice... what is justice?" :-D

Dana said...

"Sanity Clause" *giggle*

What? No "My Cousin Vinny" clips??

captain corky said...

PS Thank you for not desecrating this sacred text with any kind of picture of Tom Cruise. I may have to add that as an amendment the Corkstitution.

leslie said...

My all time favorite scene from Mockingbird is when he throws a water glass at the defendant to prove he's right handed. Snap!

Ah, Mr. Peck.

yinyang said...

"What? No 'My Cousin Vinny' clips??"

Yeah, what Dana said!

Blogget Jones said...

Love it, love it! And THANK YOU for the lack of Tom Cruise and Grisham. Ugh.

A good friend texted me last night, the moment she finished the bar exam. "For better or for worse," she said, "It's over."

I'll tell you what I told her. Congrats :o)

willSIX said...

Thank you all for your very kinds words. I can't believe I forgot "My Cousin Vinnie"...I will have to find something. I also forgot something extremely important to my central argument, which I will be posting post-haste.

Additionally, I pick on Tom Cruise, but while the courtroom scenes in "A Few Good Men" are completely absurd, the parts where the lawyers meet (particularly the fight between Cruise and Demi Moore) are, IMHO, excellent.

Thanks again, everybody!

Maddy said...

Thank you for the entertainment. Certainly made my bowl of sauerkraut much more digestible.
Cheers

willSIX said...

Katie: I'm willSix, not Corky - just didn't want you to be confused.

hoosiergirl5: The movie is "And Justice for All", and it is an Al Pacino classic.

Canadian flake said...

omg that last clip is wayyyyy too funny...the movie is soooooo goofy...Ralph Macchio..lmao.

whimsicalnbrainpan said...

LOL and congratulations!

Biddie said...

Hey Corky. Stop by my place to pick up your award :)

Pink said...

Woo hoo! Congratulations on the internship !!! You're on your way.

xx
pinks

jetsgrumbler said...

will--it will be a lot of fun going from director to intern. or not. i'm currently the intern too, and like you, i am always the same age or older than the first year associates/judicial clerks, etc.

TheBirdman33 said...

Congrats Willsix!!

I am gonna need you at some point with all my drug running and whatnot.

Mike Golch said...

Captain Corky,Love the videos from utube.I jst came to visit and say Hi.

Heather said...

Okay, I totally have to whip out my bag o' lawyer jokes now...