Monday, July 28, 2008

Benadryl Addict

On Friday afternoon I looked over at my son Max and for a brief second he looked like a reptile...

Was this because I've had my head buried in Harry Potter books for the past two weeks or was it because I had just been shot up with Benadryl in the ER and one of the side affects of Diphenhydramine is hallucinations? Maybe a combination of both.

It was kind of weird looking at Max and seeing a sleestack peering back at me, but I have had some experience with drugs in the past and was able to dismiss the disturbing vision rather quickly. Still, until I looked up the side affects of benadryl this morning, I thought it was kind of weird.

Over the past three months I've had three severe allergy attacks with all sorts of crazy symptoms, like Hives (in very uncomfortable places) Panic, swollen fingers, swollen tongues, and itchiness etc. Really, I only panicked the first time cause I didn't know what was going on, but luckily Web MD informed me of what was happening and assured me that if I didn't seek medical attention immediately I could go into shock and DIE. I heart Web MD.

When I was a child I had asthma and I was also allergic to chalk dust, house dust, saw dust, and leaf dust. In other words I'm allergic to dust. So when I went to the allergist after the first attack It was officially confirmed that I am allergic to dust. I'm also allergic to some random tree that is common to New England.

It could also be that I'm allergic to certain kinds of food, (the allergist and I discussed this) and I just want to point out that these attacks first started when I betrayed my beloved all starch diet for foods rich in whole wheat, peanut oil and potassium. What was I thinking...

Anyway since I've become really good at self diagnosis I will continue to do research and experiment with different types of food to discover what's causing these allergy attacks. Or maybe I'll just stick to eating Ramon Noodles and never think about this shit again.

Back to Benadyrl for a minute though, intravenous Benadryl use is quite enjoyable and has quickly become my drug of choice, but unfortunately I'm running out of veins for the nurses to use. If it happens again, next time I will suggest my eyeball and I will ask Turtle Boy to wait patiently in the waiting room with Mommy until Daddy is done freaking out.

51 comments:

Dana said...

I still have that hermetically sealed bubble with the fresh air supply if you need it!

Guilty Secret said...

Oh, man, no. Hallucinations involving your own children is just wrong.

Although... Max does look quite reptilian I suppose.

Like a reeeeeeeeally cute reptile.

Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeally cute.

HAR said...

Sounds like fun. I have had the pure Benadryl myself, unfortunately, to help with side effects of other meds. It creeps me out.

I hope that you get to the bottom of why the allergies are getting worse. See what happens when you f with a good them. ( Junk food)

Terri said...

allergies suck - benadryl rocks! I had my first ever case of hives this year too! It was terrible and scary. 3 days of torture and I still don't know what brought them on but I hope they never come back.

nikki said...

Man, that sucks about the allergies. I've been doing good so far this year. Although, I think I may be allergic to cottonwood trees. This year, it looks like it's snowing in our neighborhood there's so much fluff flying. When that happens, I can't breathe and I get all itchy. I never noticed it before. Of course, I've never gone to the allergist!

furiousBall said...

by this phrase... "like Hives (in very uncomfortable places) "

I'm just going to go ahead and assume balls

Jay said...

Do you think you can find somebody out on the street dealing some Benadryl? That way you could just shoot up in a parking lot or a back alley and then go home and watch Max turn into a reptile for entertainment.

dilling said...

almost sounds fun...

Knight said...

At least you see a reptile instead of something delicious like a hot dog. That would be awkward.

Last time I had hives all over I decided it was a good time to throw on my camouflage bikini and head to the beach. That scared the crap out of people.

Patti said...

I've banned myself from Web MD. It turns me into a raging hypochondriac. Which is not to be confused with a raging nymphomaniac. I don't know that Web MD can diagnose that.

fiwa said...

My god, you must be miserable. I have terrible allergies, but not at that level. I hope you find some relief.

lovins -
fiwa

Chris H said...

Sounds like you need some SERIOUS allergy testing done mate! Hell you could go into anaphylactic shock and DIE from an allergic reaction. Hives and swollen face etc... yet know that feeling. NASTY.

Big Pissy said...

Yeah! What chris h said!

leslie said...

I know what Max is gonna be for Halloween this year...

Anonymous said...

Do your hives make you resemble a very young looking John Travolta, or is that a hallucination, too?

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Tod said...

Well that sounds yukky. I hope you find out what is causing it.

Joshua said...

Well that sounds like a jolly ol' fun time had by all.

Well maybe with out the freaking out.

In the words of one of the dudes on South Park. "Drugs are bad...Mmmmmm k"

Other than that I have no advice to offer you.

Casdok said...

Sorry to hear about your allergy attacks. Hope you manage to sort them out. :)

captain corky said...

Dana: I may have to call on you for that. At least I'll still be able to blog from my bubble. ;)

Guilty: I agree, he makes a very cute turtle. and I certainly don't need to be tripping when I look at my son.

Har: The first time they gave it to me they didn't tell me what was going to happen and all of a sudden I was like wtf?!? I hope I figure it out too and fast!

Terri: Maybe there's a new allergen out there or something. It's possible. They gave me steroids for the hives and that cleared them up pretty fast.

Nikki: If you go make sure you find a good one. The one I went to gave up gave up pretty quickly. He sure was nice though.

captain corky said...

Furiousball: Yes and my ass, and under my armpits. It wasn't fun as I thought it would be.

Jay: I don't know, but I'm thinking about smoking some of the over the counter stuff. Maybe Max could help me cook it up and then bring it over to his stuffed animals for show and tell.

Dilling: The first couple of hours after the B-shot is a lot of fun. The rest I could do without.

Knight: Well, I did eat rattlesnake once. It kind of tastes like chicken. Bet you never heard that before.

Patti: I think Youporn is responsible for turning people into nymphomaniacs. Nothing wrong with have a little fun though.

captain corky said...

Fiwa: Most of the time when I'm not having an attack I have no allergy symptoms what so ever. It's crazy!

Chris H: Yeah, I need to find a good doctor.

Pissy: True. I already went to one but he was kind of lost.

Leslie: Not a bad idea. He would make a great turtle. Telling people the inspiration for the costume might be a bit awkward though.

Anonymous: Not that I'm aware of, but one time when I was having an attack I broke out into a chorus of Grease Lightning and I even left in the curse words.

captain corky said...

Jules: Thanks for the compliment and the comment. We love that around here.

Tod: Yeah, it's not fun, and I hope so too.

Joshua: Yeah freaking out isn't really for me, but i like a good drug every once in a while.

Casdok: Thanks and me too!

jAMiE said...

Oh my gosh...i hope you are feeling better, i know allergies are such a pain. Take care of yourself too, k!

Burfica said...

oh man I hope it's not food. I couldn't imagine being allergic to food. I like it to much. hahahahaha

Princess Pointful said...

ooh! Let your readers decide what you eat next! I think you should try a mustard and strawberry sandwich!

leslie said...

No, no, no... not a turtle for Halloween...Max should be a sleestack!
And you could be the Daddy sleestack.

Ashley Ladd said...

Your experience sounds so much like my hubby's. He's allergic to a lot of things and he breaks out in hives a lot.

Hugs. Hives look so painful. Those other symptoms don't sound like much fun, either. Hope you find out what causes all this so you can avoid it.

The first time my hubby broke out in hives, it was because of fillings in his teeth. Another time it was because of the laundry detergent so now we use only free and clear varieties.

Barbara Doduk said...

Although scary to have such reactions, great story telling. I laughed.

Alekx said...

Are you sure Max isn't a shape shifter and actually turned in to a turtle just to mess with your drug induced brain. I so would have done that if I were you child.

I'm just saying

captain corky said...

Jamie: Thanks. Good to hear from you!

Burfica: Yeah, it's heart breaking but apparently I'm not allergic to all the good shit that I like so I guess I'll just have to eat that stuff. ;)

Princess: As long as it's good old fashion white bread. ;)

Leslie: Not until Max is able to handle a crossbow and make slithering sounds. ;)

Ashley Ladd: When I get them they don't hurt but they itch like a bitch. Especially my hands and feet. Hopefully I'll figure it out very SOON.

captain corky said...

Barbara Doduk: Thanks. My pain is your pleasure. ;)

Carla said...

Allergies suck - benadryl would rock for me if I weren't allergic to that. However the pure adrenaline is quite the special replacement, one in which I hope I never have to use again. You be careful out there.

Aunt Jackie said...

Ewww Corky Hope you get all better!

Give Turtle Boy my love...

You'll be back to 110% soon.

whimsical brainpan said...

I'm glad you are ok (more or less) and sorry you had to go through that.

Here's hoping the hives stay away.

little wanderer said...

oh not nice, not nice at all, hope you are all better now, and that Max is back to being Max x

Peggy said...

To excape the allergens you can either move to a desert (North Africa is pretty good) or a country where ice is common. Greenland?

I heart benedryl too! It also works great on sea sickness. Better living through chemistry!!

captain corky said...

Carla: Thanks! I have to adrenaline shots ready just incase of emergency but hopefully I'll never have to use them.

AJ: Thanks! I'm feeling much better this week.

Whim: Thanks! So far I've been good this week.

Little Wanderer: I'm glad Max is back to being Max too. ;)

Peggy: I think I would take the cold. At least I could go fishing in a place like Alaska.

honkeie2 said...

I want an illness that allows to take drugs legally that make me see naked Britney Spears everywhere.

just a girl... said...

LMAO, Benadryl wires me out-IF i am in the ER. I prefer morphine, one time i saw monkeys in my room throwing pizza on the walls. Now that was weird.

Biddie said...

That bites the big one.
I haven't seen 'things' since my rather unfortunate hash episode many moons ago. I should tell you about it sometime....

Crashdummie said...

Reptile? iiiih! It makes me think of the 80s serie V... yuck!

captain corky said...

Honkeie2: That wouldn't be bad at all. Britney will always have place in my heart.


Just a Girl: I've never had morphine, but I'm willing to give it a whirl sometime. ;)

Biddie: I bet that would make a great read!

Crashdummie: I watched that show for a season or two. It's no Star Trek though. ;)

willSIX said...

Actually, there is nothing wrong with you. If life imitates Space 1999, and god help us if it does not, then Max is simply an alien life form appearing to you in a human form, and your brief moments of clarity, in which you see him for what he actually is, are being incorrectly diagnosed as hallucinations by the very same monsters!

I can't remember exactly what Martin Landau did to escape that situation, so, unless you own the entire Space 1999 collection like me, you're basically screwed.

DJ Kirkby said...

Lol, you are funny but now I know it is just becuase of the Benadryl you've been mainlining.

Farmer*swife said...

I've had Benadryl via I.V. before. I was about sixteen and a doctor had prescribed me something I was highly allergic too.

Then, as I loss muscle control and my body began to contort against my will and I couldn't move my eyes? The same doc (from the Golf Course) told my Gramm it was my imagination!!!

E.R. Neurologist ate him a new a-hole when he finally showed at the E.R. that night to check on his patient [me].

The Benadryl kicked it immediately and then I think they carted me out as I swore my true love for my E.R. phyisician! LOL! [No really, I told him I loved him.]

Bette said...

I'm concentrating on the peanut oil that you said you'd been using. One can develop allergies at any time...oh, and you mentioned that you also like peanut butter, so......If you have lots of congestion, (who doesn't in Lville?) you may want to try a neti pot. I got one yesterday and have used it 3 times. It's like a life saver. Enjoying the log :)

leslie said...

Just got a ppeek at Max TV.
Sorry, Allyson, he looks just like the Captain, but maybe with a touch of a young Travolta...

captain corky said...

Willsix: LOL! That pretty much means I'm screwed; although I do recall owning some action figures from that show.

DJ Kirkby: It's always the drugs. ;)

Farmer*swife: Yeah that stuff is potent and the first time they gave it to me the ER nurse told me I could go home and I was so high I couldn't even look her in the face without smiling.

Bette: Thanks for stopping by! I accidentally ate a cookie with some peanut butter in it on Friday and I had a mild reaction to it, so peanut butter is out!

Leslie: I think that about says it all. ;)

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muhammadrazzaq said...

It could also be that I'm allergic to certain kinds of food, (the allergist and I discussed this) and I just want to point out that these attacks first started when I betrayed my beloved all starch diet for foods rich in whole wheat,