I Want To Verb Your Noun Adverb

because I'm seventyfifteenthree!

Thursday is my birthday.  I will be (number) years old.  I will get out of bed at (number) o'clock.  I will eat (noun) for breakfast and drink (number) cups of (liquid).  Then I will try to (verb) (number) miles without falling on my (noun).  After I get back, I will eat lunch at (nonsense word) Café with my friend (female name).  After (male name)'s first day of school, we will play outside.  We like to play catch with a (adjective) (color) (noun).  Then I will go inside and (verb).  I will skip dinner and drink a bottle of (liquid) instead.  After all, that's what people who are (number) years old do best.

The Birthday Girl

Today is Ilia's Birthday. I can't believe how fast she's grown up! It seems like just thirty years ago we were kids hanging out in the woods together.

I wonder what the Lieutenant has planned for today...

You might want to celebrate outside for a couple of minutes today, Ilia. The weather Channel is calling for 79 degrees in your neck of the woods. That's not bad considering HOW FUCKING HOT IT'S BEEN THIS SUMMER.

1. Will you drink?
2. Are you going to stay home from work?
3.What kind of cake will you be having?
4. What kind of dinner plans do you have?
5.Are you having people over?
6.Will you use plastic or paper plates?
7.What do you think you're gonna get?
8.What do you want for your birthday?
9. Do you ever get the things that you want or will this year be just another dissapointing birthday?
10. How do you feel about your life so far?
11. What part does God play in your birthday?