Sunday, June 10, 2007

Introspection


Today marks exactly one month till the baby's due date. Surprisingly, I didn't shit my pants when I woke up this morning. Nope. Instead I went to the gym where I walked on the treadmill and thought about stuff. Well, I really only thought about stuff in between commercials of Law and Order Special Victims Unit. There's no way I could get through an entire hour on a treadmill with just my thoughts and pain to entertain me. I also realize that Special Victims Unit is probably the last show on earth a person should be watching a month before his or her child is born, but what can I say? I like Ice T.

I thought about a lot of things this morning. I thought about my adoption, my family and friends, the battles with my compulsive nature, my years practicing TKD, the places I've lived, and things I've seen. I also thought about Allyson and her family and everything I know about them. I realize that's a lot to think about. Especially if you consider your standard commercial block is three to five minutes long. But the question that keeps coming up in my mind is what am I going to do if Corky Jr does not like Super Heroes?!? I don't know how I would cope with that...

When my friends and I were younger we used to gauge new kids that came around by their imaginations. If a kid couldn't pretend he was a super hero and meet or exceed our expectations(and we had pretty high fucking standards) then pretty much the kid was labeled as having a personality disorder, and not having a mind of his own. What happens if this is Corky Jr?
What happens if he would rather play with a Tonka truck than with a Superman action figure? These are the kinds of questions that plague me in between commercial breaks! What if he doesn't like to fish? What if he doesn't like Football?!? What if he's not a complete clone of me? Gasp! What if he doesn't like the log, How the fuck am I going to deal?!? I could really use a Xanax right now.
Okay...I just breathed into a brown paper bag. I'm OK now. I guess no matter what I'm going to love him, but those are some really scary thoughts up there.

Anyway, everything is pretty much in order around here. Even Corky Jr's first costume (special thanks to Erika for supplying the paint and the canvass) hand painted by yours truly is ready to go. I need more action figures for the wall, and I need more wall for the wall, but that stuff will come in time.

43 comments:

whimsical brainpan said...

You mean that there are really kids out there who can't pretend that they are super heroes?!

Somehow I really don't think that Corky Jr. will have that problem.

Biddie said...

Well, here's what you do..have more than one.
Seriously. I have 3 kids - all girls, and they are all like me in some ways. Kayla is the most like me.She has my sense of humour, she LOVES comics, and super heroes (Batman is her fav), she is absoluely CRAZY in all the good ways. KC is like me in other ways. So is Jessie. It all works out.
I remember before KC was born, I was feeling very much the same way that you (seem)to be feeling now. I swear, it WILL be ok.
Promise.
One more month.
YAY.
Soon you will be three.

The Lone Beader® said...

Just take it one day at a time. Remember that the birth of a child is a miracle, so there's no sense getting all worked up until it happens. Then, you have to continue to take it one day at a time... :)

Pink said...

I agree one day at a time.

My dad and I have nothing. NOTHING in common (well we do now, alot more so than we did for years). But we found common ground in golfing. Its a great way to spend time with him without having to get all heavy and TALK!

You'll cope with it. You can always get an action figure to drive his Tonka truck.

And if he likes to play with barbies instead...well send him to see Aunt Pink. She'll help.
xx
pinks

Lola Starr said...

Ah, I'm sure you guys will have lots in common. :) And I will see what I can come up with for my post on Superheroes. ;)

Lady K said...

I'd be more worried that he likes Barbie instead of G.I. Joe...

*Stretching arms out* OH cork...it'll all work out.

Keep us posted, okay? I'm REALLY looking forward to this. Hug A for me, okay? Hang in there, bro.

captain corky said...

Whim: I think you may be right. Thanks. ;)

Biddie: We hope to have at least one more and maybe even two, but right now we're just working on this one. Very exciting times!

Beader: I'm ok, but I love your advise. ;) Thanks.

Pink: "You'll cope with it. You can always get an action figure to drive his Tonka truck".

The horror! Just kidding. It doesn't matter what he likes. I just want him to be happy.

Karma: I'm looking forward to reading it. ;)

Lady K: Thanks! I just hope that he's happy no matter what he likes.

Cazzie!!! said...

Corky Jnr will be just fine, he will be loved and cherished and his imagination will be as exciting as yours is. He wikll have two parents who love him and nurture him and will read books to him from when he is young. He will be just fine, you will see.

Cindy-Lou said...

SVU is precisely what you should be watching before the kid is born. After he's born you won't be able to watch it anymore. You won't want that on when he's in the room and you won't be able to stay up late either. Welcome to parenthood.

David said...

Don't worry, much to my wife's dismay I have my two toddler girls playing with swords and acting like cowboys! You'll have your fun :)

gawilli said...

I like Ice T too.

Introspection is not all it's cracked up to be. My advice is don't think so hard; you might hurt something. Just the fact that you're concerned is a pretty good indication that you will be a good parent. Relax and enjoy it. It's over all too soon!

Anonymous said...

I totally knew it was the dentist as soon as Fynn and Munch interviewed him!!!
I did like Munch undercover as a pedophile.

Anonymous said...

Wait, did I miss the point? We ARE talking about the SVU marathon right?

Anonymous said...

I'm sure everything will be alright, I mean his uncle Kim Jong Ramone never knew how to play any of our games and generally is lacking a personality and yet we accept him. Maybe Baby Bird can slip in under that precedent?

Angry Empanada said...

puh-lease!! he's gonna be a clone of you. start weening him ON to the comics and action figures now. teach him the difference between marvel and dc! let him love the indie stuff. teach him the rightness of women in leotards.

don't worry. you're going to be fine... now we have to make sure he's well rounded and loves football too!!!

captain corky said...

Cazzie: Thanks for your kind words! We've bought lots of books to read to the baby, but I also have a heavy dose of DVD's I plan on raising him on. ;)

Cindy-lou: I guess we'll take advantage of the 29 days or so we have left by watching Law and Order around the clock. Thanks to TNT and USA this won't be to hard to accomplish. ;

David: That sounds very encouraging. Welcome the to the log!

Gawilli: Ice T is bad ass. I look forward to embracing and enjoying every moment of it.

Birdman33: I thought about bringing up KJR's lack of a personality and imagination, but he proved himself after he reached the apple.

What a Crock: 12 hours of football every Sunday Seven months a year for the next 20 years should do it. ;) Thanks for stopping by, and welcome to the log.

Ms. Tuesday said...

nurture alsways wins out over nature. Take him to do things with you, tell him you love him, dont argue in front of him, and everything else will fall into place.

Despite yourself you're gonna be a great daddy!

Cheryl said...

I think you think too much. You need TIVO.

Blancodeviosa said...

sounds like corky jr. is getting a big brother!

Jenny! said...

Corky Jr. is going to love Superheroes...especially when dad dresses in spandex leotards and runs around the house, jumps off the garage and "flies"...who wouldn't love that!

CaraEmily said...

If your biggest concern is "What am I going to do if Corky Jr does not like Super Heroes?!?" I think you'll be OK :)

Gina said...

When Corky Jr makes his august appearance, the second thing you will notice (after the possibly squished and/or red face and/or surprisingly loud cries) is that he is, even as a tender newborn, HIMSELF. And you will love him as himself no matter what. Trust me.

furiousBall said...

I went through the same thoughts. What if my son doesn't like ice hockey? What if he's really into ice dancing or curling instead?

In the end, as a parent, you will realize the best thing in the world is your child to be happy, you'll both figure out that path as you go. Hakuna Matata.

you know how I know I'm gay?
I just wrote Hakuna Matata in someone's blog.

Alicia said...

Okay, so after a woman gives birth to a baby the hospital sends her home with a can of DERMAPLAST to numb the pain.

I'm petitioning that an 18 year prescription of xanax or valium be prescribed instead.

I don't remember how nervous Chris and I were, but I remember that as soon as Cameron was born it all melted away.
EXCEPT for the drive home from the hospital. It was EXACTLY like on KNOCKED UP where BEN is driving 20 mph.
:)

Jay said...

I don't think you have anything to worry about. I mean, if he isn't into Super Heroes or even Star Trek you will be able to deal with it.

But, we're not even going to consider that he might not be an NFL fan. That just isn't going to happen dude.

captain corky said...

Tuesday: I plan on spending a lot of time with him, and his mom too. Thanks for the kind words. :)

Cheryl: I don't know what I was thinking. I have DVR. Why didn't I use it? ;)

Blancodeviosa: That's what Allyson's afraid of. ;)

Jenny: Pretending we're Super Heroes will be fun until he's old enough to play football. Then I'll teach him how to be an NFL quarterback.

Twisted Cara Bear: Thanks for the kind words. It's a very exciting time around here.

captain corky said...

Gina: I can't wait!!!

Furiousball: What does Hakuna Matata mean (clearing stage for your big number)?

Alicia: Isn't Dermaplast used to repair holes in drywall? ;)

Jay: You make an excellent point, but I do intend to make Jr watch two episodes of Star Trek for everyone episode of Sesame Street.

Jenny! said...

You better hope he isn't bigger than you if your going to teach football!

Big Pissy said...

Corky Jr is going to be the happiest baby with the best personality!

How could he not be?

He has you and Allyson for parents! :)

Aunt Jackie said...

You know what?? No matter what you do, you'll feel like you should've done something else. In fact, you can only do your best... and in the end that is just perfect. Kids will be kids, and you can't control it all. You just have to hang on and enjoy the ride... All this worrying will only age you, so just don't sweat any of it and enjoy each phase of life as it comes. Everything always works out on its own! Just be there and love them.

Metal Mark said...

It will all be okay. Unless of course he prefers the NFC to the AFC or Battlestar Gallactica to Star Trek. Then it might be time to panic.

Heidi the Hick said...

Dude. That is your biological child. He will have an imagination...it's in his genetic code and stuff.

(besides, you can nurture that in a kid. Let him play when he's old enough. Just let him play. He'll figure it out.)

Tink said...

It balances out. My brothers' Dad was kind of upset when my 4 year old brother asked for an Easy Bake Oven one Christmas. That was also the year he developed a serious obsession with boobs. So his Dad wasn't upset for too long.

Michael Colvin said...

Only a month to go? Blimey.
When I was a kid I liked Wonder Woman...nuff said...

captain corky said...

Jenny: I don't really have big aspirations for the kid as far as football goes, but I'd be surprised if he's not on the cover of Sports Illustrated by the time he's 22.

Big Pissy: Thanks. :) We're ready to meet him!

Aunt Jackie: "All this worrying will only age you"

Good thing I did all those drugs years ago to preserve my good looks. ;)
It's going to be a blast!

Metal Mark: Two very, very valid points! The first offense is inexcusable!

Heidi: Jr and I are going to have plenty of adventures together I think. I may even take him horse back riding once or twice. ;)

Tink: I think I was 4 years old when I developed my obsession with boobs. And as they say, the rest is history.

Tod: I've got to use the word "blimey" more often. Wonder Woman's ok. The dude who created her was very into S & M.

Michael C said...

Just wait until you're driving him home afraid to go over 30 miles an hour. Yes my friend, it can happen to you...

MrRyanO said...

If you put him in a cape every day then he will have no choice but to be a super hero...or...or...a super villian! LOL!

Webmiztris said...

that's one snazzy looking superhero onesie. ;)

Unknown said...

You'll do great. And seriously though, keep that sense of humor. And what's this 'log' you're worried he won't like?? ;-)

pilgrimchick said...

SVU is certainly needed in my gym--lots of really bad music videos is what I get to see, and trust me, it does not distract from the physical pain. In order to ensure your new arrival is a fan of all you desire, make sure to start early.

captain corky said...

Michael C: Didn't I tell you? We're renting a tank for the drive home.

Rockdog: Either way I'll be happy!

Webmiztris: Thanks! Art has always been of my greatest talents. ;)

Slskenyon: Before the nurses even clean him off I'm going to read a comic book to him.

magickat said...

I'm sure his love of football and super heroes will come straight from within. It's probably in your sperm.

Ew... I don't know if sperm is appropriate for commenting. Sorry.

magickat said...

Oh - sorry I said ew when mentioning your sperm. I totally didn't mean it like that.